TLO 69: The Best, Dumbest and Most Clickable Stories of 2025 (Part 2 of 3)

9:41 AM EST on December 30, 2025

Yesterday, we unveiled Part 1 of the TLO 69. Today, we drop Part 2 – and on New Year's Eve we'll drop the finale.

Whether you skimmed a post to make sure your name wasn’t in it, died laughing in the comments, or actually pay for this thing, thanks for sticking with us. Patrick and Louis will be back next week with more exclusives, rants, typos, food lust and reasons to subscribe.

In the meantime, enjoy Part 2 of the best of the best of 2025: TLO 69...

24. 10 Oklahoma Lawmakers in Dire Need of a Free Makeover…
Date: 5/22/2025

What We Wrote: Earlier this legislative session, our esteemed Governor Stitt – or as eyebrow-waxers call him, Public Enemy Number 1 – vetoed a bill that would have extended the Oklahoma State Board of Cosmetology and Barbering...

Anyway, because I — once again — love hairstylists, I thought I would do my due diligence and find the 10 lawmakers in the biggest need of a makeover. Sadly, that excludes Kevin Stitt and his forest creature eyebrows, as he’s a law vetoer — not a maker.

25. Stitt Quietly Signs Bill to Kill Oklahoma’s Citizen Petitions…
Date: 5/27/2025

What We Wrote: On Saturday afternoon of Memorial Day weekend – always a good time to sign incredibly unpopular legislation to roll back the rights and freedoms of the people and derail their ability to self-govern – Oklahoma Governor Kevin Stitt happily and quietly signed SB 1027 into law.

Known around here as the Oklahoma Citizen Petition Oppression Act, the controversial piece of legislation will make it even more difficult, if not impossible, for any group to gather enough signatures to put a petition initiative on the Oklahoma ballot and up for a statewide vote.

26. Open Records Reveal How Stitt Micromanaged the Design of Oklahoma's Terrible License Plate...
Date: 6/3/2025

What We Wrote: A couple of weeks ago, Governor Kevin Stitt unveiled the long-rumored redesign of the Oklahoma license plate, and just like a failed gubernatorial campaign, it was widely mocked, ridiculed, and dismissed.

Although we’ve known Stitt was behind the redesign, open records obtained by The Lost Ogle reveal that he and his staff micromanaged nearly every single detail in its development — from the precise hue of red, white, and blue used in the design, to which kitschy state symbols should adorn the plate’s bottom border.

27. Poll Shows Ryan Walters Has a Real Life, Very Serious Shot at Being Governor…
Date: 6/6/2025

What We Wrote: If you’re one of the many Oklahomans who think Ryan Walters is nothing more than a self-absorbed, dangerous grifter who uses culture war rhetoric, political propaganda, and state resources to mask his ineptitude, corruption, and disdain for public education, I have some bad news for you.

According to a recent poll conducted by Amber Integrated, Ryan Walters is a legitimate, very real, very serious threat to be Oklahoma’s next Governor.

28. Marcuswayne Mullin successfully reinforces dumb Oklahoman stereotype…
Date: 6/9/2025

What We Wrote: Last week, U.S. Education Secretary Linda McMahon – the wrestling lady that Trump put in charge of the Department of Education – appeared before a Senate appropriations committee that includes Marcuswayne to lobby for a 15% funding cut to her agency.

When it was Marcuswayne’s turn to speak, he asked McMahon a set-up question about the definition of insanity – a word Marcuswayne may need to practice with his speech pathologist.

29. Remembering Our Severe Weather Savior: A TLO Tribute to Lord Gary England
Date: 6/11/2025

What We Wrote: There’s been a major disturbance in the severe weather force. Last night, we were first on the scene and on the story to report that Lord Gary England – the former chief meteorologist at KWTV News 9 and divine protector and guardian of the Oklahoma meteorological universe – passed away. He was 85 years old and survived by his wife of 63 years, Mary, daughter Molly, and countless fans across the world.

30. ONLY ON TLO: Former Dippin’ Dots CEO Breaks into Nichols Hills Home to Flee Imaginary Kidnappers…
Date: 6/13/2025

What We Wrote: According to a police report, Nichols Hills 911 received a panicked call from Fischer on the morning of April 14th claiming that – ready for this? – four Hispanic men were inside his home threatening to kidnap and sex-traffic him because he was the CEO of Dippin’ Dots and has money.

After calling 911, Fischer – a stand-up guy who’s been arrested for DUI and domestic assault and sued for revenge porn blackmail – fled his home and ran to a neighbor’s house. He broke into the house through an open garage, grabbed a knife from the kitchen, and – while still on the phone with 911 – locked himself in an upstairs bedroom.

Related:

31. Capsized: Oklahoma Taxpayers Left Holding Canoes, Dead Battery
Date: 6/18/2025

What We Wrote: Out of all the unusual, unbelievable, and ultimately unattainable ambitious Oklahoma business projects that have been announced over the past couple of years – from amusement parks to large giant skyscrapers to even larger giant skyscrapers – I think my favorite one was the effort by Stitt to lure the electric vehicle scheme Canoo to Oklahoma.

32. Man Apparently Unaware of Masks Goes Category F5 on News 9 Radar
Date: 7/8/2025

What We Wrote: Yesterday afternoon, News 9 reported that some moron wearing a dog t-shirt opened up a can of whoop ass on the station’s weather radar.

Like most idiots who spend their Sunday nights attacking radar, the vandal wasn’t smart enough to wear a mask or less identifiable clothing…

33. Stitt’s Brother Goes to Extreme Lengths to Dodge Speeding Ticket
Date: 7/11/2025

What We Wrote: One cool thing about being the Governor’s brother is that it probably makes it easier to dodge a speeding ticket.

Unfortunately for Kevin Stitt’s older brother Keith, things haven’t worked out quite that easily for him.

34. ONLY ON TLO: Vanity Perkins Accused of Stiffing OKC Mom on $1,600 Custom Gift Order
Date: 7/15/2025

What We Wrote: Last week, the TLO iTeam 5000 learned that Tiffany Perkins — a local woman who owns Hand2Hand Creations LLC and is of no relation to Kendrick or Vanity — filed a lawsuit in small claims court alleging that Vanity failed to pay for 16 hand-crafted personalized gift sets that she ordered for a destination birthday trip to the Dominican Republic.

35. Please Don’t Send Us Shocking Photos of Local Realtor Couple in the Shower
Date: 7/16/2025

What We Wrote: In the 17-year history of this site, I’ve received a lot of shocking, vulgar, and wildly inappropriate photos in the TLO inbox.

Although I genuinely appreciate our readers thinking of us when they stumble across questionable content, I do have one small favor to ask – please, in Gary England’s name, do NOT send us an inappropriate photo of local realtor couple Denise and Troy Schroder taking a shower.

36. Zumwalt Ethics Scandal Ends with $20,000 Slap on the Wrist
Date: 7/16/2025

What We Wrote: Yesterday afternoon, just six months after Zumwalt retired from the public sector following a scathing ethics investigation, the Oklahoma Ethics Commission reached a settlement deal that carries a $20,000 fine.

37. Oklahoma’s $2 Billion American Heartland Theme Park Has Flatlined
Date: 7/21/2025

What We Wrote: As most of my friends, family members, and colleagues know, there’s nothing I enjoy more than being right.

As a result, I guess I’m happy to report that the $2-billion American Exceptionalism Amusement Park planned for the Grand Lake backwoods – you know, the one that was promised to us by a Branson entertainer and a 93-year-old Pizza Hut mogul – is “all but” dead.

38. Local DJ Fends Off Naked, Hairy 400-lb Home Intruder
Date: 7/23/2025

What We Wrote: Former OKC white rapper turned block rockin’ DJ Blake Overstreet learned this the not-so-fun way.

Earlier this week, Blake O. was just hanging out at his fancy suburban North OKC home droppin' rhymes, when his wife let him know – somewhat alarmingly – that a naked, hairy, bleeding, 400-lb man was trying to break into their house.

39. Ryan Walters Accidentally Screens Retro Nudie Flick for State School Board Members
Date: 7/25/2025

What We Wrote: In what was obviously a coordinated attempt to make me late for Friday happy hour, both The Oklahoman and Yawn Doc reported earlier this afternoon that Ryan Walters – the state school superintendent who’s apparently working a bit too hard to drive porn out of school libraries, cafeterias, and study halls – inadvertently shared a graphic “retro” nude scene on a TV in his office during a closed session of yesterday’s state board meeting.

Related:

40. Prayer Warriors Bother God to Make Charles McCall Governor
Date: 8/4/2025

What We Wrote: Even though the first primary election is less than a year away, things have been kind of slow on the 2026 Oklahoma gubernatorial election front.

While we wait for those two guys to put up or shut up, the only real news to come out of the race is that Charles McCall – the snoozy former Speaker of the House who’s polling at a lowly 5% – has received the endorsement of the National Women’s Prayer and Voting Army.

41. ONLY ON TLO: Humphreys Family Announces Desperate Overhaul of Flagship Investment Fund
Date: 8/7/2025

What We Wrote: Although Kirk’s views on gays and women would probably earn him a Presidential Medal of Freedom in today’s cultural climate, his firm’s flagship investment income fund — HREIF — isn’t doing so hot.

If his uncle gave him some of Jim Traber’s truth serum, even Blair would admit it’s probably not the best look for Humphreys Capital and its HREIF to move on from a familial CEO just months after freezing all fund redemptions and slashing dividends.

42. City Leaders Celebrate Continued Destruction of Old State Fair
Date: 8/13/2025

What We Wrote: The Oklahoma State Fairgrounds are, once again, a little less cool.

Yesterday afternoon, Oklahoma City Mayor David Holt took a break from acting like he personally won an NBA title to celebrate the destruction of the historic Oklahoma State Fair Arena – a crowning piece of OKC mid-century architecture that, like so many other cool old buildings, is now just a pile of rubble.

43. MarkTurd Mullin Reveals Epically Dumb Excuse for Not Wearing Seatbelt
Date: 8/14/2025

What We Wrote: To help advance and justify the narrative to his base that DC is a violent and dangerous hellhole that requires the use of the military to keep order, Trump has summoned his propagandist political army of misfits, mouthbreathers, and morons to run into the cable news and social media void to spread fear, misinformation, and outrage.

Naturally, Oklahoma’s truck nut Senator – Markturd Mullin – ran head (ass?) first into the fray and appeared on Fox News to cast DC as a live-action Grand Theft Auto map, in the process finally explaining and justifying why he’s too cool to wear a seatbelt.

44. Report: OKC Not Being Terrorized by Face-Stealing Serial Killer
Date: 8/15/2025

What We Wrote: Last Sunday, I was hanging out with some friends, smoking cigars and drinking whiskey, and one of them asked if I had heard about the serial killer roaming around OKC defacing homeless people.

Geez. Remember back when the only social media rumors cops had to refute had to do with bands of sex traffickers targeting white women in Hobby Lobby parking lots?

45. Mayor McSelfie Embraces D-Word in New York Times
Date: 8/22/2025

What We Wrote: Now that he’s finished handing every Thunder player, staffer, and groupie their own championship keys to the city, OKC Mayor David “McSelfie” Holt has found a new way to get himself noticed and invited onto the cable news circuit – declaring his wokeness via a "guest essay" in the NY Times!

46. Bad Brew: Bice Agrees to Meet-n-Greet in Wrong Congressional District
Date: 8/27/2025

What We Wrote: Yep, that’s right. CD5 is so gerrymandered that even Bice doesn’t know who, what, and where she represents! That’s equal parts funny and nitpicky, and an ironically perfect representation of how gerrymandering has totally wrecked the foundation of our political system. Good times.

Stick around — TLO 69 Part 3 drops tomorrow, the finale of 2025’s best, dumbest, and most clickable moments.