If President Trump gets his way, Oklahomans may soon get to elect a new dumb conservative right-wing tough guy to be a U.S. Senator!
Earlier this week, media reports surfaced that Marcuswayne Mullin – our rough-and-tumble silver-spooned plumber who pays his own salary via taxation, allegedly shat himself on January 6th, and once challenged a union boss to a fight and called it “supporting workers” – is under “serious consideration” to be the next cabinet secretary for the Interior or Veterans Affairs.
Well, at least that’s the story according to Reese Gorman – the now-national news reporter who can’t leave his home state behind.
As President-elect Donald Trump’s transition team looks at building out a cabinet, there’s one senator whose name keeps coming up for a position: Sen. Markwayne Mullin.
Mullin, a Cherokee citizen who led the Trump campaign’s Native American outreach, is now under consideration to lead the Department of the Interior or the Department of Veterans Affairs, according to a source familiar with the transition.
However, sources told NOTUS that Interior would be the more likely landing spot for him, given his background and expertise.
The Secretary of the Interior position is responsible for the conservation of most federal land and oversees a number of agencies, including the Bureau of Indian Affairs, Bureau of Land Management, and the National Park Service.
That’s interesting.
On one hand, I guess it would be cool to have an Oklahoman who is a card-carrying member of the Cherokee Nation oversee the Department of the Interior. Granted, Marcuswayne is a Cherokee citizen who calls the Trail of Tears a “Volunteer Walk”—which would be like a descendant of Japanese Americans calling WWII internment camps a “government-sponsored getaway”—but I guess it’s still cool.
That being said, can’t we find someone who is maybe a little bit more, uhm, intelligent to take the job?
With all apologies to Josh “Baggy Britches” Breechen, Marcuswayne is one of the dumbest people Oklahoma has ever sent to Washington, D.C. He made Jim Inhofe – the deranged doofus he replaced – look as smart as IBM’s Watson!
In fact, I bet if you asked Marcuswayne what the Department of the Interior even does, he would say it has something to do with glutes!
Which makes me wonder: why does Trump want him? I guess he could like Marcuswayne’s tough guy, “pull-yourself-up-by-your-plumber’s-crack” vibe.
Then again, it's probably due to even greasier reasons:
Mullin, who advocates for tribal sovereignty and for the U.S. government upholding the treaties with Native American tribes, also advocated in October for the ability of tribal nations to drill on reservations, according to the Associated Press.
“Why is tribal land treated like public land?” Mullin said at an event in North Carolina. “You have natural resources being pulled out of the ground right across the fence from reservations. You have private landowners that are extremely wealthy, and you have people that are literally starving inside reservations.”
Yep, it looks like Trump needs a card-carrying Native American to help greedy white oil overlords get their hands on Native American resources. Now it makes sense.
Right now, it appears the only thing preventing Marcuswayne from getting the post is Marcuswayne.
If nominated and confirmed, Mullin would only be the second Native American cabinet secretary in history after the current Secretary of the Interior, Deb Haaland.
But that’s if Mullin would want the job.
Two sources familiar with Mullin’s thinking said the senator has not indicated whether he is interested in serving in the administration and isn’t actively lobbying for a position. But one of the sources emphasized that if he were asked to serve, he would consider it.
That has to be a tough spot for the old plumber.
On one hand, Marcuswayne has one of the easiest jobs in America – a right-wing Senator from Oklahoma! Not only is he guaranteed re-election every six years, but he doesn’t even have to do anything. He can just blend in with the Senate crowd, collect his salary, and occasionally challenge a guy to a fight. It’s an easy gig!
Interior Secretary, on the other hand, is a much tougher job. He would face more challenges and scrutiny and actually have to work. Plus, he’d have to report to Trump, which usually doesn’t work out for people in the long run.
If it were my call, I’d turn down the job and stay in the Senate. Then again, I haven’t spent the last 8 years worshiping Trump and loyally bending the knee to his supporters to the point where not accepting the post would make me look bad. I guess that throws a whole monkey wrench into the decision-making process.
Anyway, I guess we’ll wait around for Mullin like an obese Trump supporter waiting for the Red Rooter and provide updates as they come along. Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.
