We’re in the middle of May in Oklahoma, which means the College Softball World Series is gearing up, severe weather is in the forecast, and – as is tradition for the last few years – Kevin Stitt is vetoing bills for some of the dumbest reasons imaginable.
The one that has him flexing some monkey muscle was his veto of Senate Bill 837.
It would have allowed The Oklahoma Zoological Society and Tulsa’s Greenwood Historical District to – gasp! – create specialty license plates.
Since it’s a benign, totally innocuous proposal and can help nonprofit groups fund causes, Stitt naturally vetoed it.
Although he tried to spin his veto as a check against out-of-control specialty plates, it appears the real reason for the veto was to drop some animal and monkey puns.
Gov. Kevin Stitt accused lawmakers of acting “bananas” and wrote over the weekend that they needed to stop “monkeying around” and pass tax cuts.
The Republican, who has ramped up his calls for income tax cuts in recent days, appeared to try to poke fun at lawmakers as he vetoed legislation creating a special license plate benefiting the Oklahoma City Zoo…
“It’s bananas that our Legislature has time to dedicate to creating more novelty license plates but doesn’t have the time to pass tax cuts,” Stitt’s veto message said. “The Legislature should stop monkeying around and address the elephant in the room. It is time to boa (sic) up and pass tax cuts.”
Wow. Funny stuff, huh? They dropped some charming monkey puns in the press statement, because, you know, whenever a totally normal person thinks of zoos – or the city of Ada – monkeys are the first things that come to mind.
In other news, I wonder what AI program Kevin Stitt’s staff used to write that one? LameGPT? Not to ignore the “elephant in the room,” but I think a real-life monkey could write something better than that. In fact, Stitt should consider adding one of those gorillas who communicate via sign language to his comms staff.
“My fellow Oklahomans, ever since I watched Every Which Way But Loose as a kid, I’ve always wanted to have my own pet monkey, and I’m happy to add Cocoa the monkey to my communications team.”
Although Stitt’s animal puns made my eyes roll, I guess I can appreciate the effort.
I also do, slightly, admire the irony that a guy whose eyebrows should have their own Mold-A-Matic machine at the OKC Zoo apparently thinks people who like them are a special interest.
“The Legislature’s overzealous commitment to vanity license plates has resulted in a bloated catalogue full of taxpayer-funded advertisements for special interest groups,” Stitt wrote.
Does the state have a bloated catalog of specialty plates? As I noted earlier this year, the answer is “yes.”
At this point, though, what’s the harm in tossing another one or two onto the heap?
If Stitt really cared about the overabundance of specialty license plates, he’d do what a competent “businessman” would do and work with lawmakers and state agencies to revamp the approval process and clean up the current catalog.
But, as we all know, he doesn’t care about that.
He just wants tax cuts for him and his high-branch buddies, and whether it’s a license plate for a nonprofit group or breast cancer screening for somebody’s mother, sister, or daughter, he’s not going to let doing the right thing stop him.
Then again, there could be more sinister motives for the veto.
As Stitt has proven through both his hunting exploits and “Go get ‘em” message to the Oklahoma Cockfighting Association, he’s not a big fan of animals. He likes to shoot ‘em, eat ‘em, and watch them fight to the death inside an old barn.
Who knows. Maybe the veto has less to do with political gamesmanship and animal puns and more to do with his deep hatred for animals… no monkeying around.
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.
