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Skunks are attacking The Village…

11:02 AM EDT on September 10, 2014


The Village has a new odor this week.

On Monday, KOCO's Bree Steffen took a break from swiping left on Tinder to report that Nichols Hills' armpit is infested with skunks. Apparently, it's part of a controversial new program to make the city smell better.


Actually, I'm joking around. Outside of Papa Dios, I kind of like The Village. It's basically the southside of North Oklahoma City. If it ever gets a Los Tacos, I may move there... as long as I can live north of Britton. That's the Village's equivalent to SW 89th.

But I digress. Tell us about this skunk problem.


A stinky problem is plaguing The Village.

“Right in front of the steps and there’s a skunk there," resident Dave McCarthy said. "I just froze.”

It was not the animal McCarthy expected to see at his doorstep, and it wouldn’t be his last meeting with the stinkers either. He nearly ran into them while jogging.

"At first, I thought it was like a bunch of cats," he said. "And then like I got closer, and I was like ‘Wait, all those cats have white stripes on their back. Those aren’t cats!’ And then I just turned around and ran away.”

Neighbors in The Village noticed a surge of skunks this summer. Department of Wildlife officials said the cooler summer helped the population skyrocket.

Animal control already captured a dozen of the pungent polecats and expects more will come.

“I didn’t expect to come across a bunch of skunks," McCarthy said. "And I didn’t know skunks travel in packs but I guess The Village skunks do.”

Animal control officials said they’ve gotten so many calls from people wanting them to come and set traps for the skunks that they’ve had to order more cages.

Anyone with a skunk problem with skunks should call animal control

Uhm, let's take a look at that last line again:

Anyone with a skunk problem with skunks should call animal control.

I think every drug dealer I've ever had has lived in The Village, and although they may have a problem with skunk weed, I doubt they're going to call animal control. That being said, I'd like to thank Bree for the clarification.

Anyway, I have a bunch of friends who live in The Village – in fact, I think Clark Matthews was recently elected to be the city's Vice Mayor – but they really shouldn't worry. They can always call the skunk fuck eliminator. That will solve the problem:

skunk funk

Seriously, just stop the skunks from fucking and they'll go away... or move to Nichols Hills. We'll all get a kick out of that.

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