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Oklahoma Lawmakers Pony up $8-Million for New Prison Rodeo Arena

Here’s some cool news to report!

Now that Oklahoma’s government is flush with ample cash, our once-crumbling infrastructure is finally up to 21st-century codes and standards, and businesses from all across the globe are salivating to move here, our fiscally-conservative, limited-government-focused lawmakers have finally decided to turn their attention towards other pressing needs.

You know, like building a new $8-million prison rodeo arena in McAlester.

Yep, that’s right.  

With Oklahoma’s world-class education system thriving – and the health, public safety, and transit needs of all Oklahoma citizens exceeding expectations – it’s finally time to focus on important projects that not only help prop up the Oklahoma rodeo industry but also exploit our state's prison population. 

Here are details via KFOR:

The House of Representatives approved an $8.3 million prison rodeo revival fund that would go towards building a new arena in McAlester.

House Bill 3749 is authored by Representative Jim Grego (R-Wilburton) and Representative J.J. Humphrey (R-Lane). On the Senate side of this legislation, Senator Casey Murdock (R-Felt) authored it...

According to Rep. Grego, the rodeo would feature inmates with good behavior who volunteer. Participation would only be available to ‘Level 4’ inmates.

Rep. Grego added inmates’ participation in the rodeo wouldn’t shorten their sentence.

I have to give it up to our genius rural lawmakers on this one.

If you were to give me a pen and paper and ask me to write down 50 ways that $8-million could be used to improve Oklahoma’s prison system, I would have focused on things like providing better education opportunities to inmates, trade-skill development, or even increased addiction and mental health counseling services.

It never would have occurred to me to sink $8,000,000 into a new rodeo arena!

It’s actually a pretty smart idea!

Not only will it prop up the local economy, rodeo and construction industry, and give locals something to do on a Friday night, but it will also expose prisoners to possible bodily injury and harm and not leave them any means of legal or financial recourse, thus making it really cheap to insure the event where robbers, addicts and other felons ride angry livestock.

Seriously, what’s not to love?!

Sure, some of the woke nanny state types will say this is actually a bad idea, and the state should focus on more important things, but you can ignore those criticisms because this is what prisoners want!

"This is all strictly voluntary. It's amazing how many of them want to participate," Grego said. "It's amazing how many of them right now ask the director and ask the guards, 'When are we going to bring this Prison Rodeo back?'"

Who cares that anecdotal hearsay isn’t the best way to justify spending $8-million on something, or that prisoners are captives who will eagerly volunteer to tar a roof in the middle of the summer just to do something different for a day, inmates want the rodeo back so we must give it back to them!

There are other positives to building an $8-million arena for rodeos.

For example, they could stock the arena concessions with some of the $120,000 smokers that are going to waste at our state parks, and then let Brent Swadley cook up some "world-famous" bbq for all his fellow inmates. 

Plus, the arena could host other things besides rodeos. 

Who wouldn’t want to spend their SUNDAY, SUNDAY SUNDAY going to the first ever Oklahoma Prison Monster Truck Rally, or a Saturday where inmates race drones that were confiscated delivering contraband behind prison walls! 

And if you think rodeos are cruel and barbaric fun, just wait until the Oklahoma Game Fowl Commission re-legalizes cock fighting! We could start a program where prisoners raise and train their own fighting cocks to put through weekly battles and tournaments.

I guess the final benefit of bringing back the prison rodeo is that lawmakers could serve as the rodeo clowns! The job is right up their alley, because only a clown would justify spending $8-million to bring back a prison rodeo in this broken, crumbling state. 

Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised. 

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