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Politics

Colenac the Magnificent

8:00 AM EDT on September 10, 2009

tom cole

Last night, I got on to Mary Fallin for being unable to wait until Barack Obama finished speaking to start arguing with him.  What I was not aware of at the time is that her fellow Oklahoma representative, Tom Cole, did not even wait until Obama started to issue his rebuttal.

When I first read this, I thought I would skewer the 4th district's representative for jumping the gun.  Then, it occured to me that we have something special here in Oklahoma.  One of our politicians is a pre-cog!

Just think of how we could use his ability to our advantage.  For instance, here are a few things Cole could predict for us:

bradford hurt

Which OU football star will be injured next?

Now that we know that the representative who covers the Norman area can see into the future, the question must be asked:  Where was he when Sam Bradford and Jermaine Gresham were choosing to forgo millions of guaranteed dollars this past winter?

As for the answer to the question, you really don't have to be a psychic.  It's DeMarco Murray.

Will Ashlynn Brooke ever complete her Q&A?

When will Sally Kern pull her head out of her ass?

Is Sam Presti ever going to take advantage of the cap space he created?

Who will Mike Gundy chew out next?

When will Jim Traber land an interview with ESPN.com's The Sports Guy?

Who will win Ogle Madness III?

How long will it be until Aubrey McClendon owns every piece of property in Oklahoma City?

amy-mcree-pink-bikini
kristenchenoweth
blake-griffin-frolicking

What local celebrity will be the next to wear pink?

When will The Justice League of Oklahoma be turned into a live-action feature film?

What gift is Brent Skarky going to bring to my birthday party?

Will Nick Collison grow the handlebar mustache he teased on Twitter?  If yes, can it be half as awesome as I have pictured in my head?

Anyway, that was my list.  What questions would you like Representative Cole to consult his crystal ball on?  And if you want, you can check your tea leaves to answer my questions.

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