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We’ve only had 354 earthquakes this year!

10:18 AM EDT on June 9, 2016

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Great news everyone!

Thanks to the hard work of Governor Mary Fallin, The Legislature, The Oklahoma Geological Survey and the Corporation Commission (a.k.a. all things that are bought and paid for by the energy industry), it looks like Oklahoma's man-made earthquake epidemic is grinding to a stop!

So far this year, Oklahoma has only experienced 354 earthquakes from January through May. Yes, that's right. 354. For those keeping score at home, that's 21 less than we did in 2015 – the year we had a record-breaking 375 rumblers for the first five months of the year.

Via The Spin Doctors at NewsOK.com:

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Don't you love that headline? Earthquakes are declining! Progress is being made! Now move along with your life and support you local energy company! Good night!

Come on, are we supposed to be happy that we've had 21 fewer earthquakes than last year? I'm not a seismologist under the watchful eye of David Boren, but 354 seems way too high. It would be like gaining 800 lbs while attending two years of community college, and then being proud that you dropped 21 pounds during your first semester at OU. Yeah, I get it. Progress is progress, but you better get things whipped into shape or you'll die. Well, unless an earthquake gets you first.

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