Welcome to Hump Day which is just like Humpty-Hump Day but without the fur hat and rubber nose.
Here's your Ogle Madness VI Southeast Region-Upper Bracket match-ups
(1) Emily Sutton vs. (16) City of Hooker
(8) Jaime Cerreta vs. (9) Linda Cavanaugh
(4) Chuck Norris vs. (13) James Lankford
(5) Mike Morgan vs. (12) Damon Lane
So get to voting. I'm gonna go get busy in a Burger King bathroom. See what I did there? Wore out a premise in one sentence.
Vote!
(1) Emily Sutton vs. (16) City of Hooker
(1) Emily Sutton
Conference: Past Ogle Madness Winners; Hot Meteorologists
Who She Is: KFOR Weather Person Non-Male Division
Biggest Strengths: Has managed to not jump ship to Channel 9; won last year's Ogle Madness
Biggest Weaknesses: Saw her at Vast with a fella which made me want to jump out the window.
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(16) City of Hooker
Conference: Towns I thought were located on 29th and Robinson
What It Is: A town not full of what you'd think. They should have named it “Middle Aged Crying Carhop”.
Biggest Strength: The town's official motto is awesome. “It's a location, not a vocation.”
Biggest Weakness: A location, not a vocation.
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(8) Jaime Cerreta vs. (9) Linda Cavanaugh
Conference: FOX 25 Newscasters Not Named Speno
Who she is: The Nicer of the Two Attractive FOX 25 Female Anchors
Biggest Strengths: Isn't a jerk.
Biggest Weaknesses: Dave Morris is her boyfriend. Really? Come on!
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Conference: KFOR Broadcasting Legends
Who she is: Anchor at KFOR
Biggest Strengths: Has kept "Oklahoma Discount Pantsuit Warehouse" in business for years.
Biggest Weaknesses: Her tiny frame makes Kevin Ogle look huge. What's that? He is?! Oh damn!
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(4) Chuck Norris vs. (13) James Lankford
(4) Chuck Norris
Conference: Worn Out Internet Memes; Old Ass Action Heroes
Who he is: Chuck Norris
Biggest Strengths: Is Chuck Norris
Biggest Weaknesses: Pees when he laughs.
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Conference: Creepy Baritone Ginger Congressmen; Handsome Rocky Dennises; People Spencer Hicks Passes Himself Off As
Who He Is: The Arbuckles's Own Camp Caligula Leader; Congressman for Oklahoma's 5th District
Biggest Strengths: Is a congressman.
Biggest Weaknesses: Is a congressman.
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(5) Mike Morgan vs. (12) Damon Lane
Conference: KFOR Weather People We Don't Want To Date; Tie Model
Who He Is: KFOR Lead Meteorologist; David Payne jealousy sponge
Biggest Strengths: Figured out how to convey dire weather situations through neckwear choices.
Biggest Weaknesses: David Payne was the only one who knew how to make coffee the way Mike likes it.
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(12) Damon Lane
Conference: Rick Mitchell Shoe Fillers
Who He Is: KOCO Meteorologist.
Biggest Strengths: Has a sweet job on channel 5 doing weather.
Biggest Weaknesses: Isn't as accurate as Gary England, Mike Morgan, Emily Sutton, David Payne, Jed Castles, Mike Morgan's tie or my Uncle Javier's trick knee.
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