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Monday Morning Tweets: The Dean Blevins Edition

4:00 AM EDT on April 2, 2012

Good morning, people of the internet! It's another Monday morning and another edition of Monday Morning Tweets. Ordinarily I try to mix it up and post tweets from a variety of sources from week to week. But the one guy who I keep coming back to is good ol' Deano. He has such a unique style that I'm weirdly captivated by that I just can't help it. Also, he really likes to tweet. I know because he wrote this thing on New9.com about how he really likes to tweet. That was the entire column. Really. Three short paragraphs explaining how much he likes to tweet and then...a super long list of his own tweets. Really weird! Almost as weird as me listing a bunch of @DeanBlevins' tweets, which I'm going to do after the jump.

This is my favorite Dean. This is classic word-salad Dean, the one that uses overly colorful language and grammar and feels compelled to jam unrelated points into his prose, making it really hard -- although, dare I say it -- interesting reading. This is the Dean that, instead of calling someone the "greatest tennis player of all time," says they are the "greatest player to toss a furry pellet in the air."

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I know I am the lone voice crying in the wilderness about stuff like this, but it drives me absolutely crazy when journalists work so closely with people they are supposed to be covering. How can he be expected to report on Kevin Durant with any degree of dispassion when he's working with his foundation? Did he get paid for that appearance? Should News 9 disclose that whenever Dean reports on the Thunder? Those seem like legitimate questions to me. I know Dean is hardly unique in this respect here in this market, but I don't think the fact that everyone does it makes the ethics of the situation any clearer.

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I literally have no idea what this means. In case you are wondering, there is zero context to that tweet that might make it more understandable. See for yourself. The tweets right before and after that are about the Thunder. It's just a lone tweet sitting there in his timeline, making even less sense than the others. It's just a bunch of political people in a Final Four and the SCOTUS votes on it... before the debates begin. Someone tell me what I'm missing so I can understand.

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This is a new side of Dean that I only found out about when I started following him on twitter. This is what I call Puritanical Scold Dean. Puritanical Scold Dean thinks we are losing our morals in this country. Puritanical Scold Dean would have been one of the black-and-white people in the movie Pleasantville. Puritanical Scold Dean usually shows up to say something about Tiger Woods. Hey, look!

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I gotta say, I can't think of anyone in the world who would, in the span of 140 characters, think to compare Russell Westbrook, who plays basketball, to a NASA spacecraft launching pad and an Olympic diver. Strangest metaphors ever.

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That's all for this week! Follow me here. Good bye!

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