Grant Long needs to go to Olan Mills

Originally, my plans were to write a post reminding everyone that the Thunder's Brian Davis is a terrible play-by-play announcer who makes up facts and doesn't understand the nuances of the game. In the post, I was going mention how Brian Davis' suckiness made me feel sorry for his cohort Grant Long. I was then going to write something about how Kelly Crull applies her make up with an industrial strength paint sprayer.

But...I decided to forgo all that brilliant commentary when I stumbled across this thing of beauty. It's Grant Long's creepy Twitter avatar:

What is going on here? Grant Long is the color analyst for a NBA basketball team. You'd think he'd have a professional portrait or an old basketball card he could use as an avatar, not some mug shot he'd send to a girl he met on Craigslist.

Seriously, that photo is just weird. It belongs on an employee name badge at Dell. It's production quality is lower than the player introduction video that Fox Sports Oklahoma shows before each Thunder game.

"Serge Ibaka. I am from Congo."

Sorry, had to drop that in. Anyway, maybe Grant Long uses such a depressing and weird Twitter avatar because he has to work next to Brian Davis four nights a week. That sure would depress me. Then again, if I worked with Brian Davis I'd keep a ROLL OF DUCT TAPE AND AN OLD SOCK WITH ME AT ALL TIMES!!! That would SHUT HIM UP!!!

I'd also punch him every time he said "stick man."