Fried turkey, Martinelli's Sparkling Cider, mashed apathy, creamed field goal attempts, and the most underwhelming Black Friday crowd in the nation--ah, nothing like Thanksgiving in Tulsa. While you were eating Meemaw's stuffing like a recovered Atkin's diet victim and arguing about politics with your extended family, I was experiencing one of the most poignant existential crises of my real world life (which arguably has only been active a mere six months).
I know, I sound like a whiny bitch right about now, but something about Christmas in the suburbs drives content, easy-going individuals to examine their current situation and fabricate their own supposed failures. If you or your significant other is entering one of these slumps, I recommend treating yourself and that special someone to a classic night on the town in the true heart of Oklahoma, good ole' Tulsa. That is, unless you're single like me. In that case, adopt a cat, slap a bag of Franzia, and Netflix some Ally McBeal.