(Yeah, I named this column Page 3. That's what I called some column I had in college for a while and I felt like this needed a name. So there. - Royce)
I'm one of those people that really enjoys giving gifts. Of course I like getting them too, but for some reason, I REALLY like giving someone a Christmas present. And I'm not just saying that to sound like some Christmas Saint. I really not a douche, I swear.
But you know what that does? It freaking ruins Christmas for me. Instead of enjoying the lights and the music and the spirit, I'm constantly thinking about what I should get my wife's grandpa. Because seriously, what do you get an 80-year-old man that you don't know very well? Cigars? A Fats Waller album? Suspenders? See, this is my Christmas hell.
And we all know I hate shopping. So I like giving gifts, I never know what to get and I hate shopping. I'm like a riddle wrapped in an enigma. I'm the JFK Assassination of Christmas. Bad example? Probably bad example.
But other than the giving of gifts, I don't really get in the Christmas spirit. I'm not 10 years old anymore but I still want Legos and candy for Christmas. Growing up sucks because I have to "like" this new jacket or fancy picture I got. I suppose they're very adult presents and I'll surely use them, but how do I PLAY with them on Christmas Day? So as a result, my Christmas excitement is always dampened a bit.