After death-by-funnel-cloud, the second thing Oklahomans fear most is absolutely terrible BBQ, and, sadly, Oklahoma has plenty of it.
Thankfully, the newish, cyclone-friendly, twister-themed BBQ restaurant The Vortex – 9900 NE 23rd St., in Oklahoma City / Spencer – delivers a mesocyclone of bomb-ass flavor that will destroy your house, your livelihood, and, best of all, your tastebuds.
With piercing blue skies above, we arrived for lunch last Friday.
Located in a small, rural shopping center, with murals of twisters sweeping across the bare frontage, we walked into the eatery and, thankfully, there was no tornado siren blaring, but instead, the local Christian radio station pumping out the top Jesus-flavored hits.
Well, I guess if some end-of-world shit is going down, you might as well have some K-LOVE merchandise on while you go out…
There were a couple of digitized menus up on the television screen—as well as tornado precautions, natch—and we placed our orders, grabbed our drinks, and chose a booth to wait. Looking over the inside the inside of the restaurant, it seemed stable enough in case a twister formed over our heads.
Either way, as we looked over our insurance coverage and thought about making some changes to our policy, our food came out. Maybe next time!
My wife had the Two Meat Combo ($20.00) and already it was an F5 of flavor.
Though it was kind of plain in its name, her meat selections were pulled pork and chopped brisket, and they were plentiful. With a side of okra, BBQ beans, and a little cup of their homemade hot sauce, it was ready to taste.
While the okra was mighty fine and the beans were passable, it was all about the BBQ. Sure, it was a little dry at the start, but once she got the BBQ slathered on top, she was a machine. The meat was very smoky and very brazen, with the pulled pork coming out on top.
Sure, she can have her safe choice, because I have a funnel system of charred meat and supercell supremacy, the Vortex ($18.00), their signature sandwich.
Much like a reworked sloppy Joe, this sandwich had finely chopped brisket that was mixed with onions and the hottest BBQ sauce, mixed on the searing grill and topped with cheddar cheese. Served on their signature toast, this sandwich was probably going to wreck me…but I had to try.
This sandwich blew me away, no hyperbole needed. A whole new lunch creation, the meat was tangy and delicious, but it was the tongue-curling sauce that made my day. With the sweet potato fries on the side, this was the BBQ lunch I had been waiting for.
After peeling the paint off my building, I needed to try their homemade Banana Pudding ($3.50) and, as I hoped, it quelled my F5 stomach into a well-maintained gustnado. It was just what I needed as I wiped my mouth and gazed off in wild wonder.
As we got back to the car, I looked at the sky and commented that the rest of the week was going to be fair-weathered, even-tempered and, surprisingly, cool to the touch. But, I know that the Oklahoma weather can change on a dime, so I feel I should come back for lunch tomorrow and try their ribs platter…before it’s too late!
Cómpralo ya!
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Follow Louis Fowler on Instagram at @louisfowler78.
