Like most lame-duck Evangelical Republican governors elected in deeply red, low-turnout states simply because they outspent the competition, it appears Kevin Stitt is already plotting, positioning, and openly marketing his next political move on the national stage.
We know this thanks to editorials like the one Stitt recently submitted to The Hill.
Stitt—or his State Chamber handlers—likely crafted the piece to further position himself as a thought and policy leader, aiming to either: A) secure a spot in Trump’s cabinet should the former President win or attempt a coup following a defeat, and/or B) establish Stitt’s credentials as a legitimate presidential contender for 2028.
The editorial starts with Stitt making the standard conservative case for smaller government by complaining about pesky regulations and bureaucracies that protect us from the damage caused by greedy corporations.
Here's a snippet:
“There seems to be a notion that more rules equal more progress. But in reality, each brick we throw on the pile just buries the American Dream.
The federal permitting process plainly illustrates this counterproductive cycle. What started as a commitment to protecting our natural resources and people working in often dangerous environments turned into a weapon for activists. Now the U.S. is one of the slowest nations in the developed world at greenlighting new energy projects.
Endless litigious delays and overreaching environmental rules choke businesses. As a result, it can take years to get approval just to break ground. By the time you navigate all the hoops, the opportunity has passed. So instead of investing in America, businesses are forced to invest overseas, where they don’t face the same level of government delay and interference. That is not progress — it is a recipe for stagnation.”
Yep! That’s right!
Even though America has grown to become an energy-independent nation with many of the “rules” Stitt's complaining about in place, we need to get rid of them because they’re inhibiting the "American Dream," and preventing families from achieving their goals of owning an oil well, power plant or nickel refinery.
After railing against regulations, Stitt’s column takes a comically absurd turn. He suggests that the federal government should adopt a “Foggy Bottom” approach to governing, modeled after Oklahoma under his own grand leadership:
“In Oklahoma, we are showing there is a better way. It starts by forcing government to move at the speed of business. We streamlined our permitting processes, repealed outdated rules, and set clear deadlines for state agencies so that businesses are not stuck in limbo waiting for approval. If one of our state agencies fails to comply with their own set processing times, it is required to refund the application fee in full. Time is money, and we are not interested in wasting either.”
Yep, watch out America.
Just ask any Oklahoman who’s had to wait months for a driver’s license, liquor license, or a medical marijuana license – we’re moving at the “speed of business” and you’re going to love it!
Sure, the speed of that business moves about as fast as the Walgreens pharmacy line under Stitt's leadership, but I'm fine with that as long as we're not paying some lazy state employee to do the work. We're much better off modeling our customer service experience after glorious corporations like AT&T, OG&E, and Cox Communications.
Here’s more:
“However, we have to do more than just cut regulations — we must cut through the illusion that the government knows best. Americans do not need their government telling them how to run a business. Whether you are starting a company, hiring more employees, or investing in your family’s future, you should have the freedom to do so without the government breathing down your neck.”
Absolutely. You should 100% have the freedom to pursue the American Dream “without the government breathing down your neck.”
Well, unless you’re a pregnant woman who learns during a 22-week medical exam that your baby has a fatal brain malformation threatening both your lives, and you want to get a medically induced abortion to protect yourself and spare the baby from suffering.
In that case, the government will breathe so hard down your neck that you can smell Kevin Stitt’s morning breath.
Here’s more:
“As the businessman governor, I have seen what happens when government gets out of the way. It gives businesses a tailwind. Oklahoma has chosen not to try picking winners and losers, because we know that cream rises to the top. The businesses that are doing the best work and providing the best services for their customers are the ones that will succeed. When we get out of the way, doors open, communities grow stronger, and people take control of their own lives.”
Although I’m not a “businessman governor”—whatever that means—I’ve seen what happens when government gets out of the way, too.
The result? The Swadley’s Foggy Bottom swindle, the Ryan Walters Class Wallet scandal, and the Victorum Capital / Land Office suck job. Take your pick!
Seriously, how can Stitt—or whoever in his communications team wrote this nonsense—do it with a straight face? The most memorable part of Stitt’s gubernatorial reign is how he’s gone out of his way “to pick winners and losers,” letting his grifter pals run wild and waste way more taxpayer money than any bureaucrat ever did.
Here’s how Stitt’s hypocritical, comically absurd editorial wraps up:
“Government leaders must intentionally choose freedom over control, opportunity over bureaucracy, and innovation over stagnation. We need to trust our people and businesses to lead us, because no bureaucrat or spending bill will fix our problems.”
I agree with Stitt on one thing:
Much like a dopey, wealthy, hypocritical Evangelical Republican who craves power and control above all else, no bureaucrat or spending bill will fix our problems.
The difference is, unlike putting a guy like Kevin Stitt in charge of everything, they won’t make things a whole lot worse, either.
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.
