We have some good news to report, Comrades!
Earlier today, Oklahoma Lt. Governor Matt Pinnell triumphantly announced that Oklahoma motorists will soon have a new ugly eyesore to grace the backs of our vehicles!
As opposed to Mary Fallin’s maligned, muted blue design that paid tribute to the Hunger Games, the Twitter logo, and Oklahoma’s majestic peaks and mountains, the new plate is a total 180—a simplified socialist red charmer that pays tribute to Oklahoma’s original 46-star flag.
Ehh. I guess that’s okay.
I’m not a fan of the dumb little wing-dings at the bottom – and I worry just how much extra attention the red plate will garner from cops, troopers, and other LEOs during out-of-state road trips – but I guess anything is better than the blue mockingbird monstrosity that the Mary Fallin team put together.
Plus, you do have to admit, it's kind of hysterical that hard-core free market, pro-business conservatives like Kevin Stitt, Matt Pinnell, and 98.7% of all other elected Oklahoma officials approved a design theme that was inspired by a flag that was deemed too socialist in the 1920s.
Via The Oklahoman:
In 1925, Oklahoma had a problem with its state flag. Adopted in 1911, the first flag featured a white star surrounding the number "46"—for Oklahoma's status as the 46th state added to the United States—against a red field.
"By the 1920s, that much red on a flag smacked of socialism—and nobody really liked the flag anyway, because it was blah. It didn't say anything in particular," Briley said.
"By 1924, everybody was like, 'We've gotta do something better.'"
Yep, that’s right. 100 years after we realized we gotta do something better, state leaders went out and made the old flag more visible by putting it on the back of every car. I guess those who fail to learn from history really are doomed to repeat it.
To Stitt and Pinnell’s credit, I think they may be totally oblivious to our state’s socialist history—someone should tell them about the Green Corn Rebellion—and how the flag is connected to socialism.
Here’s what Pinnell had to say:
“It’s great to finally unveil the Iconic Oklahoma Plate design, which honors and highlights our truly iconic state,” said Lt. Governor Matt Pinnell. “Using color and intentional symbology, this design pays tribute to Oklahoma’s culture and history, nodding to iconic landmarks, our original flag, state animals, and more. This design celebrates much of what makes Oklahoma unique, and I am excited to see it out on the road.”
Yep, if you’re ever driving out of state and some asshole is tailgating you, don’t get mad. They’re probably just trying to decipher the microscopic, hard-to-see symbols on the very bottom.
Although I’m sure Stitt and Pinnell will be a tad embarrassed to learn they made a license plate that Stalin or Castro would have approved, I guess it could have been worse. It’s not like the 46-star flag has been co-opted as a symbol by white nationalists and other racists.
Oh, wait.
That’s famed Enid racist tiki torch holder Judd Blevins hauling around the 46-star flag at the Charlottesville Rally in 2017. He's probably a huge fan of the plate, too!
Anyway, as a free market-supporting capitalist liberal, I’d like to thank Kevin Stitt and Matt Pinnell for—whether intentional or not—paying homage to Oklahoma's socialist history, and subtly embracing a message for taxing the rich.
That being said, if they want to reverse course and bring back a timeless classic that also offers the most honest and accurate state slogan in American history, here's an option:
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.