Tulsa’s finally paying the price for those big beautiful tree-lined streets.
Late Saturday night, Tom Hanks followed through on his threat to blow through Tulsa, using his dark magic to materialize into a harrowing squall line that packed a stronger punch than the storm from Cast Away, obliterating the city with powerful, sustained ultra-magnum gale-force winds.
The storm brought some death and systematic destruction to Oklahoma’s Second City, uprooting Tulsa’s many old pretty trees and turning them into missile-like projectiles, all while tossing around the city’s power lines like a bowl of hot linguini from Ti Amo, leaving hundreds of thousands of the city’s residents without power and no place to complain about it but Twitter.