Yesterday afternoon, hundreds of people gathered at the State Capitol for Inauguration Day festivities and to watch Kevin Stitt be sworn in for another turbulent term as Oklahoma Governor.
Outside of State Rep. Danny Williams nearly falling down the capitol steps, it was a rather boring, ho-hum affair.
In fact, the only interesting thing to happen was State School Superintendant Ryan Walters unveiling his weird, creepy little hand while being sworn into office.
Yikes! I think we all know Ryan Walters is nothing more than a right-wing puppet serving those who want to privatize and destroy public education, but who knew he literally has puppet hands?! That looks as natural as his right-wing hair part. Does he also have a hole in his back where Stitt and others can control his mouth? I bet when Ryan goes to bed each night he prays for the blue fairy to make him a real boy!
Actually, I’m just messing around.
Although he does probably pray to fairies, I sadly think Ryan’s a very real person. I think the logical explanation here is that he brought a prop hand for the swearing-in ceremony since he knew he had to take an oath pledging not to accept any bribes while serving in office.
That would make sense. It would also explain why Ryan’s facial expression looks like someone just caught him pooping in kitty litter in the girl’s bathroom.
For what it’s worth, I think new Oklahoma Attorney General Gentner Drummond was aware that something weird was going on with Ryan’s arm, so he made sure to let everyone know that his arm is real and spectacular:
Now that’s how you take an oath! Gentner should probably spend a couple of minutes showing Ryan the right way to do it. It might come in handy down the road whenever Ryan has to testify to a grand jury for the Classwallet stuff.
Anyway, if you’re really really bored and can’t find anything better to do on the Internet, you can watch the full inauguration below.
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.
