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Ryan Walters’s new hair part goes super hard to the right…

An Ogle Mole spotted him out having a drink this past Monday afternoon.

10:20 AM EST on December 1, 2022

Earlier this week, an Ogle Mole sent me some pics they snapped of Oklahoma State School Superintendent-elect Ryan Walters knocking back a bourbon with State Representative Chad Caldwell this past Monday afternoon at Whiskey Cake near Penn Square Mall. 

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With Caldwell, like Walters, being a hard-core proponant of diverting education funding to shady online charter schools, Christian private schools, and religious homeschool moms who make soap out of goat milk, I imagine they were talking about all the different ways they can destroy Oklahoma schools from the inside once Walters officially takes office. 

Here are the pics:

First of all, as an important man of high taste who’s also fond of conducting business over a late afternoon whiskey (Blanton’s) or Scotch (Glenmorangie 18), I can’t really blame or fault Ryan for leaving work early on the first Monday back from a long holiday weekend while the students and teachers he’ll soon represent watch the clock tick away in the classroom. 

With rank comes privilege, and like it or not, Ryan was hand-picked and groomed by the State Chamber of Commerce, OCPA, and the Oklahoma chapter of the Young Presidents Organization to help put public education funding in the hands of greedy business leaders, shady parents, and other schemers, so he’s definitely earned the right to have leisurely afternoon drinks while the people he'll oversee work hard in the classroom. 

That being said, what the hell is going on with his right-wing super hair part?

Yikes, with a part like that, Ryan is probably going to demand that all students greet him with “Heil Walters!” whenever he visits their school to inspect bathrooms for kitty litter, remove books from libraries, and round up all the teachers for Patriotic History Reeducation Training!

Seriously, has the hair part always been that right-wing extreme?

I guess every time I see Ryan he’s usually facing forward, filming a video selfie from his beige SUV – or wearing a MAGA or NRA hat – so I’ve never noticed it. 

Anyway, I guess if you ever run across Ryan Walters or any other Oklahoma politician out having an afternoon drink while the people they allegedly represent are hard at work, send them our way. 

Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised. 

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