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Smelly Plant Blooms at Myriad Gardens…

5:34 AM EDT on April 1, 2022

When I opened up my computer to write something this morning, my choices were between the recently signed "Save Women's Sports Act" – the latest attack on trans teenagers by the State GOP – or a big smelly tropical plant called a Corpse Flower that, after an eight-year wait, is in the process of blooming inside the Crystal Bridge at the Myriad Gardens.

Since the Corpse Flower is a real thing, and not a manufactured wedge issue created by transphobic politicians that's now being equally exploited by the flack channels of each political tribe, I figured I'd rather write about the stinky flower.

Here are the details via the Myriad Gardens website:

Corpse Flower Set to Bloom in the Crystal Bridge Conservatory Visitor Lobby soon!

Our corpse flower, Amorphophallus titanum, is blooming for the first time in Crystal Bridge Visitor lobby. Our director of horticulture, Nate Tschaenn, got this plant as a seedling eight and a half years ago and has been patiently waiting for this moment. We expect a very smelly flower to open in the next week.

Wow. They've waited for 8-years to grow one single stinky flower? I appreciate the dedication, but they could have just as easily planted a couple of Bradford Pears and had the same effect!

According to the Myriad Garden folks, The Corpse Flower (a.k.a. Amorphophallus titanum) gets its name because it reeks of rotting flesh and death when in bloom. Basically, it smells like the Oklahoma Capitol. I guess this evolutionary trait attracts flies, beetles, Oklahoma politicians, lobbyists, and other insectoids who are tricked into thinking they can lay their dirty eggs in the plant.

For those who want to watch the majestic blooming unfold without smelling like Kevin Stitt's morning breath, the Myriad Gardens folks have created a live stream of the event. Although it's a bit like watching grass grow, it's kind of soothing, and beats writing or reading a hot take on a manufactured political issue that was created by transphobic politicians for political gain.

If you want to watch the flower greet the world in person, you can swing by the Myriad Gardens. They claim they'll have extended hours when the plant blooms and reeks of death.

That being said, if you want sweeping, partisan, non-nuanced discussion on the Save Women's Sports act, hop on Twitter! If you can filter through the over-magnified hot takes of Will Smith's slap of Chris Rock, you won't be disappointed.

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