We're taking a break from our long-running "Jim Inhofe Is Still An Idiot" series to break some actual non-idiotic Jim Inhofe news.
According to both national and local media reports, longtime senile Oklahoma Senator Jim Mountain Inhofe will announce on Monday that he's retiring at the end of the year.
There's been no official word on why Inhofe is stepping down, but some are speculating it's related to the health of him or his wife. It could also be that he's so old that radiocarbon dating won't even work on him, and he wants to spend his remaining few days flying planes upside down and hunting pigeons.
Since Inhofe won't technically retire until the end of the year, that means we'll be blessed with an extra-saucy how-far-right-can-you-go special election to fill his seat in November.
The typical batch of names who get floated around for Oklahoma elections are being floated around here – T.W. Shannon, MarcusWayne, Pinnell, etc. – but Inhofe has already thrown a curve snowball and endorsed one of his evil understudies for the job:
I honestly don't know a lot about Luke, and apparently, the Internet doesn't either. I found one YouTube video where he spouts off some tired and traditional right-wing focus group-approved talking points with the Farm Bureau nuts. So far, my only observation is he has resting-putz face.
I have no clue if endorsements from senile fossils carry a lot of weight, but due to his connection with Inhofe, Holland has already hit the ground running and has a campaign website. I doubt that will stop other right-wing contenders from walking into the octagon, though. As Inhofe has proven, whoever wins the race virtually gets a lifetime Senate appointment full of financial perks and associated fame. Who wouldn't want that gig?
Even though a Republican will win the seat, Democrats are still entitled to include their own sacrificial lamb. Could Kenra Horn run? She tweeted this once the news came down the pipeline:
I think Kendra would be a quality center-of-the-road candidate and may surprise some people and get over 37% of the vote. Unfortunately, she's probably too responsible to do any better than that.
For example, if Kendra attended a tween Valentine's sleepover, she'd probably bore the kids to death talking about congressional committee procedures and the need for bipartisanship in Washington while slowly sipping on a dram of Blantons. I doubt she'd chug wine and sleeping pills and vomit on the kids shoes.
Anyway, we'd like to congratulate Jim Inhofe for doing the right thing and announcing his retirement, and allowing a new generation of right-wing sycophants to embarrass our state and people on the national level.