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Bible Burns: Could the Holy Book Be Put in Oklahoma Schools…Only to Be Taken Out Again?

4:51 AM EST on January 6, 2022

As long as other holy books of various religious dogmas are sitting right beside it, I don’t mind the Christian Bible being available in Oklahoma public school libraries. Of course, I don’t have kids and never will, so I guess I don’t have a God in this fight.

But, in the Oklahoma State Senate, Republican Sen. George Burns—say goodnight, Satan!—wants to force it down your kids’ throats, ensuring a new generation of Christ-based fear and loathing.

He’s currently pushing Senate Bill 1161. It will basically create "Sunday School" as an elective course for Oklahoma students and ensure that the King James Bible is available in school libraries for kids who don't know how to get one for free. From the Oklahoma State Senate:

“Our Founding Fathers relied heavily upon the scriptures in the formation of our country, and the Bible they used was the King James Bible, which makes it an important historical document,” said Burns, R-Pollard.  “It influenced the writing of the major documents that created this country, including the Constitution.  It’s historically accurate to use that version, and it is in the public domain, which is also important.”

But Oklahoma politics are funny, and by that I mean incredibly stupid. We've reached the point where the right-wing legislation introduced by our lawmakers is now starting to contradict itself.

As The Oklahoman's Carmen Forman noted, right-wing pandering Republican Sen. Rob Standridge recently filed a bill that would make it easy for parents to remove sexually graphic books from school libraries in order to prevent indoctrination. Remember that?

"The purpose of our common education system is to teach students about math, history, science and other core areas of learning—all of which are further expanded on in college as students pursue their fields of interest,” Standridge said. “Our education system is not the place to teach moral lessons that should instead be left up to parents and families. Unfortunately, however, more and more schools are trying to indoctrinate students by exposing them to gender, sexual and racial identity curriculums and courses. My bills will ensure these types of lessons stay at home and out of the classroom.”

The Bible has been used for about 2,000 or so years to indoctrinate people and teach moral lessons, so you'd have to assume Standridge would be the first person to line up to ban the Bible from Oklahoma school libraries? Right???

If so, you'd have to hand it to him. It would be a noble crusade that would keep lewd, sexually filth like this out of Oklahoma classrooms:

"Rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love." (Proverbs 5:18–19)

"Here she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses. So you longed for the lewdness of your youth, when in Egypt your bosom was caressed and your young breasts fondled." (Ezekiel 23:20-21)

"How beautiful and pleasant you are, O loved one, with all your delights! Your stature is like a palm tree, and your breasts are like its clusters. I say I will climb the palm tree and lay hold of its fruit. Oh may your breasts be like clusters of the vine, and the scent of your breath like apples, and your mouth like the best wine. It goes down smoothly for my beloved, gliding over lips and teeth. I am my beloved's, and his desire is for me." (Song of Solomon 7:6-13)

We should note that both of these proposed bills are just that – bills. The odds of them passing are low, and their main purpose is to pander to the Evangelical right and remind people that our elected officials are morons. That being said, it is entertaining and funny to watch their blatant attempts to pander and indoctrinate finally start to contradict. Keep up the great work.

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Follow Louis on Twitter at @LouisFowler and Instagram at @louisfowler78.

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