We're now on to the next round in South Region of the OGLE MADNESS IX tournament! This bracket has some really intense news / weatherperson matches. Has Damon Lane grown powerful enough to usurp Emperor Gary? Can the sweet persona of Shelby Hays manage to triumph against Joleen Chaney? Do Oklahomans love Onion Burgers enough to take them to the next level? Only you, the readers, possess the answers to these burning questions.
(1) Gary England vs. (9) Damon Lane
(4) Weather Dongs vs. (5) Onion Burgers
(3) Baker Mayfield vs. (6) Sir John Michael
(2) Joleen Chaney vs. (7) Shelby Hays
Vote!
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(1) Gary England vs. (9) Damon Lane
(1) Gary England
Round One: Defeated Obesity
Who He Is: Exalted Weather Deity/reigning Ogle Madness champion
Biggest Strength: Controlling the wind and the thunder, keeping you advised
Biggest Weakness: X-ray vision has diminished in recent years
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(9) Damon Lane
Round One: Defeated Mike Morgan
Who He Is: KOCO meteorologist
Biggest Strength: Stays calm under pressure
Biggest Weakness: Stuck at Channel 5
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(4) Weather Dongs vs. (5) Onion Burgers
(4) Weather Dongs
Round One: Defeated John Moreland
What They Are: Incidental phallic imagery during weather broadcasts
Biggest Strength: Can humiliate even the proudest weatherperson
Biggest Weakness: Fleeting
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(5) Onion Burgers
Round One: Defeated Ten Commandments Monument
What They Are: Hamburgers with a mound of grilled onions
Biggest Strength: Can make a vegan reconsider their life choices
Biggest Weakness: Gives you awful breath
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(3) Baker Mayfield vs. (6) Sir John Michael
(3) Baker Mayfield
Round One: Defeated New Wayne Coyne
Who He Is: OU quarterback
Biggest Strength: Excellent headband game
Biggest Weakness: From Texas
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(6) Sir John Michael
Round One: Defeated Wayne Payne
Who He Is: Wizard from the future who lives in a school bus
Biggest Strength: Smooth with the ladies, +1 with a staff
Biggest Weakness: Refuses to wear a shirt
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(2) Joleen Chaney vs. (7) Shelby Hays
(2) Joleen Chaney
Round One: Defeated Lawton
Who She Is: News 9 reporter/Watermelon Queen
Biggest Strength: Can fit inside a watermelon
Biggest Weakness: Attracts wild Gallaghers
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(7) Shelby Hays
Round One: Defeated Kyle Singler
Who She Is: KOCO meteorologist
Biggest Strength: Cheap taste in clothes
Biggest Weakness: See above
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