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Reddit user whines about buying Star Wars tickets at Warren Theatre…

10:57 AM EDT on October 20, 2015

Before we get to this post, I have a confession. I'm a Star Wars fan. On a scale of 1 to 10, I'm a six or seven. I owned the toys, wore the underwear and have the movies memorized, but I've never been part of a gang called The Wamp Rats or argued on a message board about whether or not Greedo shot first. Basically, I'm a fan but not to the point of a being a virgin or Jedi OKC Board Member.

I bring all that up because "Star Wars: The Force Awakens" trailer dropped last night during Monday Night Football. Watch it again from your desktop or mobile device:

Anyone else get chills? I was hooked about 10 seconds into it, which is about how long it took me to see that George Lucas really had nothing to do with this movie. Seriously, isn't it refreshing to see actual cinematography and filmmaking in a Star Wars film and not just a bunch of cartoony CGI shit stuffed on a screen? Fuck you, George Lucas! You ruined the prequels!

In addition to the trailer, tickets for the film were released last night. Naturally, they were in high demand. Instead of buying them online, one Oklahoma Reddit user thought he would outsmart the system and buy them at the Warren Theatre. We know this because he (I assume it's a "he." Star Wars nerd groups are overwhelmingly male) whined and complained about the process on Reddit.

Check it out:

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First of all, would a Jedi exhibit this type of behavior? No. Also, why would you called the theatre before Googling? Losers who do that may be the most annoying humans on the earth. In fact, I'd rank them just ahead of indoor soccer players and grown men trying to buy movie tickets two months in advance and then complaining about the process on an internet message boards.

mad reddit star wars3

Come on dude, you're really being a dick to the 16-year-old movie theatre employees? They're not Braum's employees. It's not their fault the owners of The Warren have no clue how to sell tickets to nerds. I bet you're the same asshole who yells at the Cantina band for playing the same song over and over again when they're just doing their job and playing what the manager tells them.

Also, can you imagine being the kid who answered the phone and had to deal with some combative, indoor soccer-playing sarlacc who refuses to join Facebook out of principle? What a weirdo. The poor kid on the phone was probably so terrified you could see sweat seeping through his or her cummerbund.

The rant continues:

mad reddit star wars4

Yeah, take notice, Warren Theatre. You need to get your shit together. Meanwhile, the grown-ass man who berates 16-year-old employees, plays indoor soccer, calls before Googling, and buys tickets to see a Star Wars movie on opening night has everything figured out.

Anyway, the only reason I wrote about all this is so I could have an excuse to post that damn trailer. It's so awesome. I makes me want to growl like a Wookie. Watch it again:

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