I guess this explains why no one showed up to your garage sale!
Earlier today, a Mole sent me a link to the following Craigslist ad. It was posted by Paulette with 1.800.2SellHomes or whatever it's called now. She's turned into a sign vigilante, and is now offering to buy all those annoying yard signs you see cluttered along busy intersections and highway service roads.
Here's the ad:
That's pretty cool. I wonder what Ug and Chico or going to do as a response? If I was them, I'd offer $5 for every damaged TV someone tossed a brick through from watching too many 1.800.2SellHomes commercials. Seriously, could those ads be any worse? It's like Linda Soundtrack turned into a Stepford wife. Here's my favorite one:
And who could forget this one with Sweet Brown:
Anyway, 50-cents a sign seems like a pretty good deal. In fact, it's such a good deal that I just went and priced signs on the Internet hoping I could turn an easy profit. Unfortunately, the lowest price you can get is about 99-cents a sign. I guess you would need to develop a scheme similar to Kramer and Newman's glass bottle deposit racket to make serious money at illegal sign collecting. That's probably for the best, because according to Oklahoma City code it appears impounding illegal signs may be against the law:
Removal by impoundment from right-of-way, public property, or private property.
Sign impoundment without notice authorized. Any sign situated in the right-of-way of a public street or in a required sight triangle, or an unanchored sign or one which has been damaged by storm or collision in such a manner that its presence constitutes a threat to the health, safety, and welfare of the public, is hereby declared a public nuisance endangering public safety, and upon discovery, it may be impounded by the Mayor or a member of the City Council, a Code Enforcement Officer, any Police Officer, such other employees of the City as may be designated by the City Manager, or any person contracting with the City as an independent contractor to impound such signs subject to the supervision and control of the City Manager or his/her designee. Those responsible for the placement of signs and/or the causing of signs to be placed, located, built, constructed, or who benefit directly or indirectly from the placement, location, building or construction of said signs in violation of the Code are subject to penalties set forth for applicable Code violations.
Okay, so only Mayor Mick, the City Council and a few other people can profit from Paulette's offer. Elected officials get all the breaks.