Thanks to an act of God, I had gone most of my life without ever seeing, touching or eating a McRib. Then, a couple of years ago, one of my asshole friends shared his joy of the McRib coming back, and proceeded to explain to me that it's the greatest thing ever:
"You gotta try it, dude!"
The following day, I headed down to one of the McDonald's in my local trapezium and ordered a McRib for lunch. I'll save you a detailed review, but let's just say I've never forgiven my friend. The McRib wasn't the worst thing food I've ever put in my mouth, but it was close. Calling a McRib barbecue would be like referring to a Little Caesars "Hot N' Ready" as pizza.
I bring this up because last night I stumbled across this story on Gawker. Apparently, McDonald's has hired one of the guys from Mythbusters to dispel, mask and hide some of the disgusting facts about the company's food. One of the first items on his list: The McRib.
In celebration of the almost-annual winter return of the McRib, McDonald's dropped a few videos today that purport to reveal the secrets of everyone's favorite barbecue sauce-covered restructured pork item. They do, kind of.Things you will see: A bunch of actual pork, albeit after the bones have been removed (at least it's not pink slime); the machine that presses the pre-cooked patties into that strange ribless-rib shape; Grant Imahara's career change from Mythbuster to corporate myth-perpetuator.Things you won't: Anything about the conditions under which the pigs that go into a McRib are raised and killed. Basically, you don't get to see how the McSausage is actually made. This is an #ad, after all.
I'm not sure why – it could be that I was high on Nyquil or just like to get off on torturing myself and reliving painful memories – but I clicked on the video. And there, at the very start, some big dude in a bowtie explains why McDonald's flew him out to Oklahoma City to see how the McRib is made.
Here's the video:
Outside of the visible shame on Grant Imahara's as he realizes he's now a shill for McDonald's, I think my favorite part in the video is when the bowtie dude makes a wise crack like "That's how you keep it tasty like my grandmas's barbeque!!!" and then later on in the video he admits that he's never even tried a McRib. You have to love native advertising. It's so honest.
Here's another video of the factory:
Isn't this the most Oklahoma City thing ever? We're already the Fast Food Capital of the world. I guess it figures that we produce (and flash freeze) one of the most disgusting foods of all time, too. Big League City, huh?