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Someone finally shot an Iowa Steak salesman…

Glyn Mearanto

Chalk one up for the good guys.

Last week, the doomsdayer pictured above – Glyn Mearanto – lived out everyone's fantasy when he shot one of those creeps who cruises through neighborhoods trying to convince people to "buy the last case" of a frozen, brown, gooey substance that's allegedly meat.

Maybe next week he'll go after a door-to-door magazine salesman.

From KOCO:

An Oklahoma airman has been arrested and another man is recovering after police said the airman shot a door-to-door salesman simply for knocking.

Authorities said 33-year-old airman Glyn Mearanto shot at Steven Michael Williams with a .410 shotgun loaded with buckshot. Williams was selling meat door to door and knocked on the Mearanto's door to try to make a sale.

"Quite frankly, it’s a bit unclear as to why he would just open up the door and open fire on somebody with a shotgun," said Sgt. Gary Knight.

The crime happened near Spencer. When police arrived, they found a home that looked more like a fortress.

A fortress? What exactly does that mean?

Mearanto had signs like "Beware of everything" and "Private property" plastered along an 8-foot fence, displaying images of guns and warning people "Controlled Area – It is unlawful to enter this area without permission of the installation commander."

The blast only grazed the unsuspecting salesman, and police arrested Mearanto.

The crime almost went unreported until the victim’s coworker told him if he called police he "could get $1 million out of this."

According to the report, when police questioned Mearanto, he said he was home alone with his daughter, saw a "strange truck" in his driveway and became concerned.

He said any reasonable person would not have ignored all the warning signs he had posted.

I would agree. Any "reasonable person" would probably avoid knocking on the door of some guy's private Thunderdome. Then again, these Iowa Steak Salesman are about as reasonable as a hungry penguin. They're basically what happens when a Schwan's salesman turns to crack. For a living, they aggressively sell Arby's quality meat and they don't carry Horsey Sauce. That should be a crime.

That being said, shooting one of these dudes is a bit over the top. If you want them to leave you alone, simply ask if they'll stick around and have a steak dinner with you after the sale. They'll suddenly remember that "they're late for another appointment" or "have to go back to the warehouse because they're all out." Then you'll never hear from them again. Well, at least until they knock on your door in a couple of weeks to sell thermal windows or siding.

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