Skip to Content
Everything Else

APB: Who’s the guy with the Fruit Loopmobile?

2:04 PM EDT on April 17, 2013

When I was kid, I loved going grocery shopping with my grandma because she would always let me pick out a couple of boxes of cereal to take back to her place. And she'd let me get the good kind, too. It wasn't like going grocery shopping with mom where I'd have to choose between bagged "Honey O's" or shredded wheat.

If I had to rank my five favorite cereals as a kid, it would go something like this:

5. Corn Pops: Corn is good. Sugar is good. Corn and sugar combined is really good.

4. Cookie Crisp: I haven't had this cereal in years. I remember it having an odd, dehydrated, Chips-Ahoy! flavor to it. I think that's a good thing.

3. Fruity Pebbles: A few years ago, I went on a retro cereal kick and bought some Fruity Pebbles. It was terrible. It was sweeter than Sweet Brown drinking a cold pop. But it was pretty amazing when I was a kid. The best part was drinking the milk. It was like liquid sugar.

2. Frosted Flakes: I think Frosted Flakes was the only name-brand cereal my mom would let my brother and I get. Because of that, I'm pretty sure I had a bowl of Frosted Flakes as an afternoon snack everyday from 1987 - 1992. And yes, I'm not sure why I was never diagnosed with juvenile diabetes. I should probably donate my body to science.

1. Captain Crunch Berries: The roof of my mouth is still scarred from all the Captain Crunch I consumed as a child. It's like having hot pizza mouth, only worse, because you can't cure it with a cold beer.

Anyway, the reason I'm sharing my favorite cereals with you is because some Mole sent me a pic of this car. They found it on Channel 5 reporter Mark Seiden's Instagram page:

fruit loop car

Okay Moles, who is this guy and why in the world did he paint his car like that? Is their some cool Fruit Loops thing that I'm not aware of? Was it the topic of a Jay-Z song or something?

That's just weird on so many levels. For one, how in the world could Fruit Loops be your favorite cereal? I didn't even make my Top 5. It's like the Landry Jones of cereals. It's above average, serviceable, kind of fruity, and nobody's favorite.

Also, doesn't driving around a car that looks like a big box of children's cereal kind of make you look like a pedophile? A car like that shouldn't be allowed within 1,000 feet of a school, playground or Jenny Craig office.

Okay Ogle Mole Network, any information you can share about this car, it's owner and why he chose to do this would be helpful. I'd like to talk to him about giving my sail boat a Captain Crunch paint job. I'm sure that will impress all the ladies.

Stay in touch

Sign up for our free newsletter

More from The Lost Ogle

Everything Else

Lawmaker annoyed we wrote about her Klan…

She's doing her best to distract people's attention away from the issue.

January 27, 2023
Everything Else

TLO Bar Review: Lunar Lounge

We strapped the space gear on our newest contributor Sierra and sent her to this out-of-this-world bar in Midtown.

January 26, 2023
See all posts