Welcome to the Great Oklahoma Cricket Outbreak of 2012!!!

9:45 AM EDT on August 30, 2012

Well, it's a good time to be a lizard in Oklahoma.

Yesterday, Marisa told us about the onslaught of deadly black widow spiders that are currently hiding in your garage, bedroom or underneath your desk at work. That's all scary and everything, but now we have a bigger problem on our hands...crickets.

Via NewsOK:

As if coming to life from a scene in a science-fiction film, swarms of black clouds are swooping down on Oklahoma.
Clouds of crickets, that is.
The state's cricket population is so high this year it reminds Oklahoma State University entomologist Rick Grantham of the 2007 outbreak.
Grantham was in Okarche recently when he happened on thousands of them. Crickets were stacked outside the Eischen's Bar and restaurant.
“It was so warm and dry in the winter and then a warm, wet spring. So nothing (insects) died,” Grantham said. “When you have as warm of temperatures as we did this winter and the soil did not freeze, we have an inordinate amount of insects.”
In 2007, crickets were crowded along sidewalks and even were found 3 feet deep in Boone Pickens Stadium. Crickets would get in the lights and on the field.
“It is going to be that way this year. Wait until Friday nights,” Grantham said. “Those lights at stadiums are going to be attracting crickets.”
Chirping crickets can be a nuisance indoors, but they don't pose a health threat. They are attracted to light and are highly active at night.

Listen, the people who think crickets don't pose a health threat are either smoking crack or have never gone insane while trying to locate a cricket in their bedroom at 3:00am. They also have never been startled by that very same cricket the following morning when putting on their work shoes.

Seriously, I'd go with spiders or scorpions or centipedes over crickets any day. At least spiders have the decency to shut up the hell and leave you alone (or silently stalk you while you sleep). Crickets are just assholes. They chirp and chirp and chirp and then when you finally get irritated enough to hunt them down, they shut the hell up and wait for you to go back to your seat. When you do that they then chirp and chirp and chirp again, which I think is basically their way of making fun of you.

Fucking crickets.

Anyway, hopefully the weather gets cold soon (yeah right) and all the crickets freeze and die. I'd love that.Not only would we have dead crickets, but jacket weather would finally be here. I love jacket weather.

Patrick @okcpatrick

Patrick is the founder, editor and publisher of The Lost Ogle.