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This Crossroads Mall security guard is a big dummy

6:54 AM EST on February 20, 2012

Last night, an Ogle Mole sent us this picture that he discovered while surfing Reddit. It may explain once and for all why Crossroads Mall has become such a haven for crime and gang violence over the years:

Here's a little bit of advice for the Crossroads Mall management team. The next time you're looking for a security guard, don't go out and hire the relative of a 1980s crash test dummy. Sure, they never complain, work long hours and don't come with the added expense of having to lease a Segway, but as you can see, they're pretty worthless. At least make it carry a rifle or explode whenever it sees a rape or something.

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