Full disclosure: I graduated from Mustang High School. Therefore, I dislike Yukon and can think of many reasons it sucks. All the kids that went to Yukon High were stuck up jerks that thought they were going to Edmond North and only graduated so they could enroll at OCCC. The town smells, the mayor is probably an idiot and everyone that lives there hates America. That should cover it.
But seriously though, I basically grew up in both Yukon and Mustang and Yukon is a great town. It's totally exploded the last 10 years. There are good places to eat everywhere. They are building a brand new high school, which is supposedly going to be pretty nice. (Though Yukon High will now be located on MUSTANG ROAD. Suck it, Yukon.) Overall, Yukon is a great place to live. But in the spirit of this silly little column, let me give a few negatives:
The Dollar Theater. Now they've finally wised up and built a new movie theater a couple years ago, but for the last 200 or so years, the only place to catch a flick in Yukon was the Silver Cinemas Dollar 5 Theater.
Four things: 1) It used to be a dollar for a ticket. Now it's like $4.50 or something. Not really much of a "dollar" theater then, now is it? More like "dollars," amirite? 2) Sometimes it gets new releases, sometimes it doesn't. It's hit and miss. If you can't wait to see Alvin and the Chipmunks on opening night, I guarantee you they'll have it, because I have no desire to see that. If you're looking forward to District 9, forget it. They'll get that after it's released on DVD.
3) No place is more outdated. The concrete floors are constantly sticky, there are only two stadium seating screens, the seats actually have a puff of dust when you sit in them and I think if you eat a hot dog there, you will die. It's very much like The Alex in that Seinfeld episode. If someone wanted to do a re-enactment of John Wilkes Booth assassinating Lincoln, Silver Cinemas 5 would be a good candidate. And 4) The parking lot is completely screwed. It's all on a slope. In some areas, I think if you're driving a conversion van you might actually have to fear your vehicle tipping over while you're inside catching The Proposal. And what inevitably happens when you're parked on a slant is that some moron doesn't think about it when he opens his door and gravity swings the thing hard right into the side of your car. How do I know this? Because I was the moron once.