Move over, Macaulay. Take a bow, Kid From Home Improvement. Get a washcloth, Golden Huffer. It’s time to welcome OKC Thunder not-great Kyle Singler to the Oklahoma Mug Shot Hall of Fame!
In case you missed it, the former OKC Thunder punchline whose haircut, athleticism, and jump shot horrified fans for a brief moment in the mid-2010s was arrested in the backwoods of Haskell County – a.k.a. Southeastern Oklahoma – for apparently getting high on something and assaulting his girlfriend.
Here are the details via the scholarly Lori Fullbright:
Yikes, I think every OKC Thunder fan knew how much this guy sucked as a player, but I didn’t think any of us had a clue how much he could suck as a human! Seriously, screw Kyle Singler. We probably should have known something was up when he – a wealthy NBA player – was trying to meet women on Tinder:
Talk about the warning signs being there — I knew there was something off with him after I published that article. I don’t care how bad you are at basketball, outside of maybe 1980s rock stars, nobody needs to use Tinder less than NBA players. That’s exactly what DMs and groupies are for!
Anyway, because we live in a more woke-ish, less cool society now — and making fun of people with substance abuse and mental health issues who commit domestic assault is frowned upon these days from multiple angles — I think I’m going to wrap this up and share those mental health and domestic violence disclaimers they tack on to every newspaper article now.
If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health or substance abuse issues, help is available. Call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, available 24/7.
If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, call the Oklahoma SafeLine at 1-800-522-7233 (SAFE) for confidential support and resources.
Although I think it’s silly for news to have public service disclaimers, that felt good. I hope everyone remembers how nice and respectful I was, if my face ever ends up in the Oklahoma Mug Shot Hall of Fame someday.
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.
