The absurd Edmond North High School American Flag Controversy™ continues to fly high.
As we mentioned on Friday, Edmond North served up a new controversy on a red, white, and blue platter for Ryan Walters to exploit when they told student Caleb “Captain Patriot” Horst to remove the obnoxiously large American flag he was flying out of the back of his pickup.
As a result, overly patriotic students, their piggybacking parents, and the desperate news media latched onto the pedantic controversy, culminating in a Monday morning ‘Merica rally ironically attended by people who more than likely dream of living in an alternate reality where the South won the Civil War.
You know, people like this lady:
Yep, if it’s the American flag today, what are they going to ban tomorrow? For the sake of everyone, let’s hope it’s Bluetooth earpieces! They’re bizarre and irritating and I refuse to take anyone seriously who still wears one in 2024.
Angry Edmond women sliding around on slippery slope arguments that ignore the context of the issue – students are not allowed to fly any flag, not just the American one – aren’t the only people with strong opinions.
John Schneider – an actor better known as Bo the Blonde from The Dukes of Hazzard – filmed a quick video in support of Caleb’s flag-flying defiance:
Listen. The Dukes of Hazzard was one of my favorite shows when I was a wee lad, but if your only claim to fame is riding around in an orange car with the Confederate flag painted on the roof, maybe lay a bit low on this controversy. Seriously, we don’t want to give these patriotic Edmond students – especially the ones related to the lady who teaches Civil War planning seminars – any ideas!
For a safer opinion, I want to hear the thoughts of Mr. T.
He, much like Bo Duke, is a patriotic, no-nonsense type and – at least in the 1980s – was accused of crimes he didn’t commit. As an added bonus, the only thing he’d inspire Edmond students to do is show up to school wearing a bunch of heavy chains and gold jewelry!
Seriously, can someone make this happen? I really want to hear him say, “I pity the fool who asked Caleb to take his flag down.”
On the topic of fools, Ryan Walters filmed a vlog about the issue.
Kind of like the lady with the Bluetooth, he predictably misrepresented the controversy. He then vowed to indoctrinate all Oklahoma students and make sure they grow into proud, flag-in-pickup-bed patriots:
Man, did Ryan up his Ambien dosage? That was pretty tame by his standards. I thought he was going to call for the Edmond North principal to attend Patriotic Reeducation Training or announce that the district is being investigated by Simon & Simon or Hart to Hart.
Anyway, we’ll continue to monitor this story and provide full updates, complete with 1980s pop culture references, as they arrive.
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.