Whether it’s a tornado or wildfire, earthquake or flood, ice storm or blizzard, inland hurricane or syphilis outbreak, there are plenty of disaster-movie-plotline ways to die in Oklahoma.
I guess we might as well add alien invasion to the list.
Last night, KFOR’s Katelyn Ogle put on her space armor and investigated a mysterious unidentified object that some dude on the Southside filmed flying over our city’s skies.
I guess that makes sense.
If an alien civilization is going to travel thousands of light years to colonize our planet, extract its resources, and enslave all people, they might as well start things off in South Oklahoma City.
And I guess it should all be covered by an Ogle.
Born into the high halls of House Ogle under the watchful gaze of Lord Kevin, Katelyn is a spirited second born and will forever be the pepper to her sister Lady Abigail's salt in the grand tapestry of OKC broadcasting nobility.
But while Abigail might charm the realm with the light and warmth of morning news sunshine, Katlyn has always been more intrigued by the shadowy depths of the dark TV news arts. She can often be seen working late into the night at the family keep at Fort Latebreaking, where amidst ancient teleprompter scrolls some thought were lost for the ages, she researches spells, potions and other Neilson-inspired concoctions that are guaranteed to lure a TV viewer's gaze.
So, is this report a fanciful product of Katelyn’s forbidden research, or is it a legit news story about a real-life mysterious object?
Check out the video below, and you be the judge:
When I first saw the video, I questioned its authenticity.
I figured it was probably another “satirical joke” by the TikTok Crypto Bro who makes up deceptive lies for financial profit:
Or that maybe Katelyn was being duped by the same person who pitched her the Rural Folks Back Up ERs From Horse Dewormer story:
But then I saw someone else shared a similar video, so it had to be real:
Katelyn eventually talked to scientists who seemed to treat the video seriously.
For example, some said it could be from a Space X launch, while the old Omniplex astronomer dude thought it could have some sort of X-Files-inspired origins:
News 4 also caught up with local astronomer Wayne Harris-Wyrick, who does not believe it came from the Space X launch, and has his own theories.
“I looked at all the launches of space x and other public announced launches,” said Harris-Wyrick. “My best guess is Vandenberg Space Force Base launched some sort of secret military flight, or whatever is they do.”
Vandenberg Space Force base is in California. We called, but a public affairs representative told us the timing of their launches also don’t match up.
They directed us to another Space Force base in Florida, who said it didn’t belong to them either.
Imagine working the phones at Area 51 or whatever and having Katelyn Ogle call to confirm secret spaceship launch dates. That had to bring a chill to their spine.
“Code Red! Code Red! The Ogles of Oklahoma are onto us! Get the President on Line One and wake up the other lizard people. It’s finally time to reveal ourselves! Everyone meet at the old reptile museum in South OKC at 2pm.”
Although Katelyn called secret government agencies and astronomers for science museums, I guess she apparently failed to do a search on TikTok to see if this phenomenon has happened before.
For example, here's one from January 7th:
And here's some from last year:
I have no clue what the object is, but I'm going to assume it's one of Gary England's weather machine experiments.
Then again, it kind of looks like it’s blowing smoke rings like Gandalf in Lord of the Rings. If the eye of Sauron finally forms over the Devon Tower, I guess we’ll know the object’s origins are based in the fantasy genre as opposed to science fiction.
Anyway, if you see some weird shit flying in the sky, I guess take a grainy video, put it on social media, and send it to KFOR so they can investigate. After that, run into your house and take safety precautions. Once again, you just never know what sort of disaster movie phenomenon will strike us next.
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.
