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Markwayne Mullin sticks his finger in people’s noses…

2:28 PM EST on November 21, 2023

I think we all know who stuffs the Thanksgiving turkey in the Mullin household. 

Just when you thought Markwayne couldn’t look any dumber following his contrived and choreographed tough guy act during a Senate hearing – and the PR campaign that followed it – Politico filed a report documenting how the Oklahoma jokester politician likes to stick his fingers into moist human orifices, specifically people’s nostrils. 

From Business Insider via Politico:

The wife of a former Republican congressman said Sen. Markwayne Mullin put his fingers in the noses of sleeping congressional spouses for photo ops on a trip to Israel.

Well, that puts a trip to the holy land in a new perspective. 

I thought about quoting more from the article, but I think that sentence succinctly describes Markwayne’s uniquely imbecilic and juvenile behavior, and just how perfect of a representative he is for (most) of the Oklahoma people.

Last week, Clytie Bunyan with The Oklahoman argued the opposite, claiming that Markwayne’s behavior in Washington wasn’t reflective of Oklahoma values, but I totally disagree.

If anything, I’d say Markwayne is the perfect epitome of the conservative Oklahoma idiocratic culture that currently rules this state. He’s a stooge, hypocrite, and moron who values traits like masochism and willful ignorance over compassion and intelligence. 

Seriously, if you went to the local Walmart or cockfight and asked people if they’d rather their Senator respect their office and act professionally or challenge union bosses to fights and pick the noses of other congressional delegates on foreign trips, the first response would probably be “What’s a Senator.”

Once you explained to them slowly who a Senator is and what they do, I think we know what the answer would be.

From my 45 years living on this red earth, I know way too many Oklahoman dudes who would find what Markwayne did to be totally hysterical.

In fact, they probably do the same thing to people who doze off on the charter bus for the church group trip to Six Flags. To these idiots, sticking your finger in someone’s nose is all silly fun and games until, of course, they’re the victim of the prank. Then they get mad and want to fight you. 

Anyway, now that we know Markwayne likes to stick his fingers in colleagues' noses as they sleep on buses, it kind of makes you wonder where else his hands and fingers have been over the years, especially in the locker room before MMA fights. If you have any guesses, leave a comment.

Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised. 

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