I guess they don't have a lot of mirrors at the state capitol, do they?
Yesterday afternoon, after hearing that VW is the latest company to ditch Oklahoma, State Senate Pro-Term Greg Treat announced he's creating a resume-friendly “business retention and economic development select committee” to figure out why companies don't want to move here.
Yep, that’s right.
The politician who panders to the far right on cultural issues, and has helped shape and implement our state’s ultra-conservative practices and policies over the past two decades, doesn't quite understand why businesses don't want to move to Oklahoma.
Here’s an official statement he left about the committee:
“Oklahoma has abundant resources, qualified employees and a legislature and executive branch that is friendly to the business community,” said Pro Tem Treat.
“We have a history of going out of our way to offer advantages other states cannot. There is no reason for us to continuously lose out to another state in this country on major business developments. That is why I am determined find the common denominator as to why we aren’t being chosen and figure out how we can become more attractive to businesses looking to expand or relocate."
Yeah, he’s going to find the “common dominator” as to why we’re not being chosen. I hate to be Captain Obvious here, but maybe one reason for our failure is that most Oklahomans don't even know what a common denominator is. Seriously, I bet if you conducted a poll at the local Walmart, they'd say it's some sort of demonic terminator.
Anyway, an Oklahoma lawmaker wondering why companies don’t want to do business in Oklahoma kind of feels like an Andrew Tate newsletter subscriber wondering why women won’t go out with him, but, either way, I figured I’d save Sen. Treat and other people a bunch of time and money and just list some of the reasons why Oklahoma is always skipped over when legit companies that aren’t on the verge of bankruptcy choose to expand or set up shop…
1. Dumb People…
You don't have to spend too much time at the State Fair Midway on a Saturday night to know that the average Oklahoman isn't the brightest kid on the lot. I mean, there's a reason we rank near the bottom in every education category, right? If you owned a big successful company, why would you want to move to a poor, uneducated place where you can’t find quality employees?
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2. Weather…
Our weather is so extreme that even Sly Stallone can’t handle the heat, much less white-collar battery cell engineers!
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3. Ryan Walters…
This relates to #1, but if you were in charge of figuring out where to move a big business, would you really want to send your employees to a place where the person in charge of education was more concerned with student bathrooms than test scores?
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4. Tigers…
In 2020, Joe Exotic officially replaced the Oklahoma City Thunder as the topic of conversation most Uber drivers bring up when they learn you're from Oklahoma. Fair or not, Oklahoma being known as a premier spot for methed-out trailer park tigers has hurt our state’s image, and may affect a company’s decision to move here.
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5. Oklahoma isn't for everyone…
To quote the great Oklahoma governor Kevin Stitt:
“We’re finding people moving here from the quote unquote liberal states because of their policies,” he said, adding that he and other state leaders were clear about their conservative principles. “It’s not for everybody. If this is not who you are, great, you don’t have to live in our state.”
If your state isn’t for everyone, today’s “woke” corporations that actually value all of their employees, not just the conservative white ones, may want to look elsewhere.
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Those are just five of about 500 reason why businesses may want to look at other spots outside of Oklahoma. If you have your own reasons, do us and Senator Treat a favor and leave a comment.
