Last week, the New York Times took a less than flattering, snidely honest look at The Oklahoma inferiority complex, and specifically, our state’s sad, kind of desperate attempt to be more like our asshole older brother to the south – Texas.
The headline and sub-head give you an idea about the tone and scope of the column:
For the most part, the column hit all the talking points publications use when talking about the Oklahoma business and political climate. You know the drill:
• Mention the OKC MAPS projects
• Mention the Kaiser Family's $10,000 “Please Move to Tulsa” bribe incentive
• Mention the state’s dependence on the oil and gas incentive and failed efforts to lure other industries
• Mention the political purpling of OKC and Tulsa
• Get a dumb quote for a politician
For the dumb politician quote, the paper went with one of our most reliably dumb politicians – Governor Kevin Stitt. They also made sure to use a photo of Stitt that showed the rest of the country just how much dumbery we're working with here:
Geeze, could the times have used a pic that made Stitt look a little less oafy? He looks like a vacuum cleaner salesman who just took a shit inside a McDonald’s bathroom.
Here’s what he told the paper when asked about attracting new business may make Oklahoma slightly less insanely conservative:
Governor Stitt, a businessman and political newcomer when first elected in 2018, said that he did not worry that efforts to attract newcomers to the state’s urban centers would alter its political identity.
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“We’re finding people moving here from the quote unquote liberal states because of their policies,” he said, adding that he and other state leaders were clear about their conservative principles. “It’s not for everybody. If this is not who you are, great, you don’t have to live in our state.”
“Oklahoma – It’s Not For Everybody.”
If that’s not the most God-honest tagine I’ve ever heard about the state, I don’t know what is. It even puts “Oklahoma is OK” to honest shame. We should slap it on billboards and put it on license plates immediately.
Anyway, if it seems kind of weird that the Governor of Oklahoma is basically warning people who don’t agree with his far-right political idealogy that they don’t have to live in our state, that’s because it is. I’m sure that rhetoric will really get businesses that don’t make pillows lining up to move here.
Seriously, come on Stitt! What are you doing? At least lie a tad and spin things into a positive. You know, something like “We welcome everybody to experience our twisted interpretation of Oklahoma freedom. Even the crazy libtards from California!”
That will definitely make us more like Texas.
