Last week, TLO head honcho Patrick sent me on a special mission that most food writers can only dream of completing.
"Braum's has a new Double Quarter-Pounder Nacho Burger. You should try it so I don't have to."
Always eager to please, I quickly made my way to my neighborhood Braum's ice cream and dairy store and, perhaps flustered by a case of pre-emptive meat sweats, ordered the wrong thing.
Well, at least I think that's what happened. I am a stroke survivor and Braum's isn't exactly known for their order accuracy, so who knows what transpired, but I ended up with a California Chipotle chicken sandwich...
Providing a well-meaning surfer vibe, the deep-fried chicken is topped with sliced tomatoes, American cheese, and a “generous dollop of fresh, tangy guacamole,” so help me God.
I was surprised that it wasn’t too bad! Guacamole is my preferred sandwich topping, and here it’s slathered in spicy spades. So, more power to Braum’s and their associates!
But…sigh…Patrick assigned me to try the Nacho Burger, and I needed one asap.
So, I hopped in my car, went to a different Braum’s out of sheer embarrassment, and placed the correct order.
Check out this nacho attack:
Gently unwrapped, this is a big burger. In the middle of sesame seed buns were two slabs of beef, Colby jack cheese, jalapeños, pico de gallo (or some reasonable facsimile), mountainous tortilla chips, fresh-ish guacamole, and, for the piece de resistance, searing nacho cheese bubbling forth, dripping onto the signature Braum's foil wrapper.
With my tiny tongue and lips, I tried to break down the burger the best I could. Unfortunately, the insides came apart at the seams during one bite, and nacho-burger goo promptly streamed down my shirt and, embarrassingly, onto the front of my pants.
Though I was taken aback by my accident, one thing was sure: it is a fuckin’ good burger.
The patties of meat and the cheese are one delicious thing, the guac and chip combo are a tasty-crunchy treat, and the rest of the innards provide a guided tour of your mouth, with the expressions of bated breath trying to release this nacho-fied monster to your belly.
With every bit of my sauced being, I took a few extra bites until I was done. Never typical, this is Braum’s Nacho Cheese godhead. Give it, or the California Chipotle, a try before they are gone or, heaven forbid, die in a guacamole overdose. It’s the silent killer.
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