On Thursday afternoon, only a few months after my return to The Lost Ogle, my damaged cerebral cortex and I got a little scared.
"What are these blue and yellow colors, clean fonts, and most importantly, why I can't I log-in?" I wondered aloud, bracing for numbness in my extremities.
It turns out, I wasn't suffering a stroke. Patrick launched a new brand and website for The Lost Ogle without me.
I have to admit, the site looks nice even though I still haven't figured out how to log-in. It has a new face, a new layout, a new logo, and everything else. That’s great, but I am worried that it might be too “great” for someone who has had a few massive brain bleeds. More aspirins, please!
My only real complaint – outside of not knowing how to log-in – is Patrick didn't consult me on how to make this site better. I figured I'd share them below...
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More Pro-Stitt Coverage!
With him allegedly trailing the polls, the Oklahoma voter seems to be un-boarding the Stitt-wagon. That should not stand! In our role as the ultimate Oklahoma antagonists, we should provide more upbeat and positive Stitt coverage and at least one free Swadley’s side for each new subscriber.
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Free Slightly Damaged Sex Toys with a new Subscription
If free Swadley's doesn't tickle your loins, how about a slightly damaged sex toy? Sure, the road rash may be a little off-putting, but with the city streets and highways teeming with sex toys, we'll make sure they're put to good use.
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More Affluent Homes Coverage!
One way to sucker in rich people with money is to profile homes only they can afford. The Governor will love it!
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Make it Harder to Log-in
Am a registered? Do I send the code or reset my old password? Where's the log-in button? I know technology is a savage beast, but could Patrick just make it a little bit harder for me and everyone else to log-in?
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UnWokable Uber Alles!
The Lost Ogle Show Podcast is alright, but don't you think it’s time to…wake up? We have heard you loud and clear: it’s the new UnWokable Ogle Podcast and it’s ain’t your typical right-wing jack-booted all-American podcast! Featuring the best guests on the woke-osphere, all Ogle-sized, all the time!
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Hot Guy Friday!
Patrick canceled this series on me after two editions. I say it's time to bring it back.
