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Oklahoma prepares Sylvester Stallone for life in Hell…

6:19 AM EDT on July 26, 2022

It didn't take Sylvester Stallone long to figure out what Oklahoma is really like!

Four months after jovially proclaiming Oklahoma is "the Paris of the Southwest," Stallone is now singing a different tune and claiming the state has prepared him for a life in Hell.

We learned Stalone's thoughts about this fiery fly-over cauldron of eternal damnation we call home when he replied to an Instagram comment that Andrew Dice Clay left on his Instagram...

Here's the Instagram post:

Here's the comment:

Yep, Sylvester Stallone thinks Oklahoma has prepared him for life in Hell... and the dude hasn't even made it to August yet!

I hate to break it to you Sly, but you still have a ways to go before you can claim you went the distance! When August 20th gets here, expect a sweaty, bruised, and melting Stallone to be wandering aimlessly around the OKC Cock Ring, yelling "Adrian! Yo Adrain! We did it! We did it!"

Well, at least I hope that's what happens.

Then again, maybe Stallone isn't even referring to the weather. Maybe he's referring to our state's draconian laws and policies, or perhaps he's getting tired of Mayor Holt stalking him for a selfie.

Either way, we'd like to thank and congratulate Mr. Stallone for making it through four months of Oklahoma people and weather. By staying indoors for the next month, he may make it to the end of shooting. We hope he at least returns back for a quick visit in late September or early October so he can enjoy our state's three weeks of Fall before winter sets in.

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