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The Z-Team: Kevin Stitt plays tough guy at the border

4:36 AM EDT on October 8, 2021

Instead of trying to, you know, actually help the state that he was (somewhat) elected to run, Gov. Kevin Stitt was apparently in Texas this week, on another useless taxpayer-funded field trip, this time to the Southern border to, officially, learn about the illegal drug trade, but, unofficially, to strap on a bulletproof vest and look as butch as possible for photographers.

Stitt claims to be at the border searching for the dastardly drug methamphetamine and the evil Mexicans that poison our kids with it, which I guess must be easier than looking in your wife’s purse. Regardless, while down there on his fact-finding mission of macho fragility, he thankfully found the time to stick it to Biden, at least the best way he knows how...which isn’t very.

From FOX 25:

“The crisis that President Biden created at our southern border is unbelievable. In the last year alone, a record of over one million individuals have been arrested or apprehended attempting to cross into the United States illegally. This border crisis affects our entire nation. In Oklahoma, we have seen an increase in the trafficking of illicit drugs, namely methamphetamine and fentanyl, which are being smuggled across our southern border from Mexico. Most methamphetamine available in our state is produced in Mexico and fentanyl-related deaths are up over 150% over the last year. This is a serious security issue directly impacting Oklahomans," said Governor Stitt.

If Stitt is so serious about trying to stop the drug trade in Oklahoma, why doesn’t he do it at our borders, the ones that he was (somewhat) elected to defend? Hell, why doesn’t he do it right in my neighborhood…that would make much more sense to me and get plenty of dangerous product off the street, but I suppose that’s far too much work for him; I guess it’s hard to appear excruciatingly heteronormative while cruising down NW 16th in a flak-jacket and a half-empty bottle of Aquafina. God bless Texas!

Looking at this picture, however, it surprises me that Stitt thinks that he has an actual, honest-to-God chance to be the President of the United States. Forget that, in the debates, he’d come in as one of those candidates that is polling so low they aren’t even invited to the podium, throwing a fit that would lose him any state, except, of course, Oklahoma. But I digress.

As for Stitt’s recent trip to the border, he’s got a few pictures of him looking tough on a boat and, in a speech any day now, will somehow tie all that meth to those dangerous Indigenous people, via the McGirt ruling. If he hasn’t already, of course.

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Follow Louis on Twitter at @LouisFowler and Instagram at @louisfowler78.

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