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Law and Order

Real-Life Frito Bandito Steals Truck and Hauls Ass to Enid!

Sometime in the late sixties, Frito-Lay had a somewhat offensive Latino character called, inappropriately enough, the Frito Bandito. Though retired in 1971, who would have thought he’d make a comeback this weekend and, even better, that he’d be some white dude?

Identified as 34-year-old Joshua Karpe, the flavorful tortilla chip thief stole a large delivery truck when the driver stopped for a drop-off at the Circle K located at NW 39th and May—home of some truly terrible Subway sandwiches, by the way—and eventually made it to Enid with a full chip haul.

From KFOR:

“I would love to know the motivation of stealing a truck that’s very, very easy to spot and doesn’t go very fast. What do you think you’re going to do with a truck like that?” said Capt. Jeff Spruill with Oklahoma City Police.

I’ll tell you the motivation: a truck packed with those delicious Frito-Lay snackables! I’ll admit that, many times as I’ve seen the sliding side-door open and those chips just sitting there, the grand temptation has been hard to fight, but, not wanting to be a stereotype to my people, I've routinely fought against it. It’s a hard life.

But what stopped this hungry hooligan? A highway patrolman shooting out the tires. Man, would I have loved to of seen that Burt Reynolds shit!

“During the course of that pursuit, the vehicle swerved towards law enforcement vehicles at least three times, as if purposely trying to hit them,” Spruill said.

Police say he hit a deputy’s vehicle at one point. An Oklahoma Highway Patrol trooper shot the truck’s tires in an attempt to disable it.

“Eventually the tires on that truck went flat and that’s what ultimately caused it to stop,” Spruill said.

Too bad it ended the way it did, because I can only imagine him flipping over a few times, showering the road with those delicious bags of name-brand chips, then rushing out of my passing vehicle to grab a few bags of them, only to be rewarded by the Frito-Lay corporation for my valiant efforts.

A man can dream, right?

A criminal he may (supposedly) be, I think we should, at the very least, give him a round of applause for making it to Enid. If it was you or me—most likely me—we wouldn’t have gotten down the block before being filled with more holes than this Blanco Bandito’s work history.


Follow Louis on Twitter at @LouisFowler and Instagram at @louisfowler78.

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