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Derplahoma lawmaker wants to protect us from vaccine tracking devices…

12:02 PM EST on February 2, 2021

I have bad news for you, Bill Gates. The geniuses in the Oklahoma legislature are on to you.

Over the weekend, an Ogle Mole let me know that State Rep. Justin Humphrey – the serial wacko bill-filer who wants to create a Bigfoot hunting season – has introduced Oklahoma House Bill 1653. It would require vaccine makers to disclose whether or not their vaccines contain things like "human parts, animal parts, metals in any quantity, tracking devices, or any DNA-altering properties."

Check out this madness:

That's great. It kind of reminds me of Ralph Shortey's old bill that would have prevented aborted fetuses from being sold as food products in Oklahoma. Speaking of Shortey, it's nice to see he's still able to inspire Oklahoma lawmakers while making sandwiches behind bars.

Anyway, although you may be quick to criticize Humphrey on this, I think it's good that he's being a forward-thinking leader, and doing his part to protect the Oklahoma people from hazards that don't exist. Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think there's anything wrong with asking vaccine makers to disclose if they're injecting us with hazardous concoctions made from baby toes, lizard snouts and quicksilver particles that track our movements and alter our DNA.

Well, unless you want to unwittingly gain superhero powers.

That being said, aren't there more important things to worry about here? You know, real issues that affect us here a now, like chemtrails polluting our atmosphere with mind control agents, Jewish space lasers spawning Oklahoma wildfires, or weirdo lawmakers who believe in bat-shit crazy stuff helping mold and craft our laws? Hopefully, they address all that next year.

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