Lost Ogle Faces Existential Crisis! Launches Membership Program To Survive!
11:58 AM EDT on March 25, 2020
Hello Internet person who comes to this website to read what we write!
Like all of our partners in the OKC food, arts, entertainment and retail scenes, the Coronavirus pandemic has hit The Lost Ogle hard. Although web traffic has increased as we all succumb to Corona-mania, 85% of our advertising and event revenue has evaporated in less than a week due to the economic collapse, providing an immediate, existential threat to this website.
As a result, we're going to pull the tarp on something we planned to launch in May to coincide with our 13th birthday: The Ogle Mole Membership Club. It's a monthly membership program for our readers, fans and enemies who want to financially support our very unique, difficult-to-define brand of satire, tabloid news, political coverage, snarkrage, food reviews, media criticism, political incorrectness and occasional humor.
The Ogle Mole Club has three different monthly membership levels:
To be clear, you can still view our content and articles for free. This is just something for those kind souls who want to support what we do, even when it sucks!
Q: "That's cool, but what do I get from a membership outside of the occasional enjoyment of reading this website?"
A: "How about a FREE Gift!"
Sign up for a membership today and we'll send you...
$5 Junior Ogle: "Collectible" Lost Ogle Ink Pen.* Yes, that's right – a collectible Lost Ogle ink pen, the very same shiny and cheap black and white model that we're currently not using at any of our cancelled trivia events!
$9.99 Ogle Mole: "Collectible" Lost Ogle Ink Pen + Limited-Edition Koozie.* Your heroic membership will earn you a pen and a "limited-edition" Lost Ogle koozie. Down the road, we'll also send you an Ogle Mole Membership Club card that you can use for free stuff and discounts at local businesses!
$19.99 Oil Overlord: "Collectible" Lost Ogle Ink Pen + Limited-Edition Koozie + Ownership of Patrick's Soul.* Hi, Mr. Hamm. I know you and your buddies read this. For signing up, we'll send you a pen, koozie and hand-signed letter acknowledging ownership of a small, minute portion of my soul. And no, I'm not making that up!
*Please allow 4 -6 weeks for delivery.
"Cool, what else do I get?"
Once again, this is something that we had planned to launch later in the year. At the moment, the only added benefit of a membership is the gratification that comes from supporting local media, owning a piece of my soul and keeping us afloat during a rough patch when we really need to be afloat.
You can sign up below or by clicking here. All the payment stuff is securely handled through Stripe. We'll send your gift to the billing address. We also promise not to sell your data and other stuff to anyone but Emily Sutton:
Looking to make a one-time contribution, click here.
Anyway, if you're still reading this, we'd still like to thank you for supporting and reading our site over the hopefully years. We also want to thank all of the local businesses that have supported us, and turned this operation into a sustainable OKC institution. Once again, they're going through a tough time, too. We can't wait to work with them again when things return to normal.
Thanks for sticking with The Lost Ogle. We'll keep you advised.
Patrick is the proprietor and publisher of The Lost Ogle.