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Loser poses as “Undercover Cop” in failed effort to woo El Chico bartender…

7:05 AM EST on February 1, 2018

Based on my life experiences, I would guesstimate that 87% of guys with low self-esteem have lied about what they do for a living when trying to hit on a girl at a bar. In the short-term, it seems like a smart plan, especially if you plan on ghosting her if it miraculously works out.

"Hmmn. She obviously won't be impressed that I'm a team leader in a call center. I'll just lie and say I'm a doctor instead."

Now that I'm a successful blogger with a large Internet following, I don't have to resort to such pathetic tactics to woo women. Unfortunately, not all men have it as good as I do. Taylor Hansmeyer is one of those men.

Via KFOR:

A man accused of pretending to be a Norman police officer has been arrested and charged after allegedly trying to arrest a bartender.

Taylor Hansmeyer was arrested and charged with impersonating an officer.

It happened at the El Chico Café inside the Sooner Mall. Hansmeyer, an employee at the mall, was drinking tequila at the bar.

Employees said he looked and was acting normally, until he started giving the bartender a hard time for not checking his I.D.

So, how does one exactly "look and act normal" while drinking alone at the bar of a mall El Chico? Do you have to openly sob and mourn your own existence, or is it like On The Border where you just stare off into an empty bowl of cheap salsa reflecting on regrets and other life failures? First time caller and I'll take my answer off the air.

Here's more:

Police said he took the questioning further, claiming to be an undercover officer.

"He made some statements regarding the fact that he was an undercover cop, why didn't she I.D. him, he was working on an undercover project," Sarah Jensen with the Norman Police Department said.

According to the affidavit, he threatened to arrest her and several others at the bar.

Wait. There were "several others at the bar?" Who knew that El Chico was the place to be at Sooner "Don't Call Me Fashion" Mall!

The restaurant owner declined to go on camera but told News 4 that Hansmeyer even called him on his cell phone several times, giving him a fake badge number and telling him the bartender could be in trouble.

Hansmeyer left the bar, but returned a short time later, this time with handcuffs.

The bartender told police he grabbed her by the arm.

"According to the victim, had tried to put her into handcuffs," Jensen said.

Her coworkers and management wouldn't let him cuff her or take her away, at which point he left and they called the police.

That takes things too far. Whenever I would say I'm a doctor, I wouldn't leave and then come back 10 minutes later with a stethoscope and tongue depressor and ask the girl if she's ready for a check up.

Naturally, some guy pretending to be a cop and trying to handcuff an El Chico bartender got the real cops' attention. They arrested Hansmeyer:

When police arrested him at his home later that night, Hansmeyer said he just told the bartender he was a correctional officer.

"He denied physically trying to assault the victim by putting her in handcuffs," Jensen said.

News 4 tried to track him down at his home but he wasn't there.

However, family told News 4 he was just flirting with the bartender.

He was just "flirting" with the bartender. You know, kind of like how those guys on "To Catch A Predator" show up to inform the girl that meeting men in chat rooms is dangerous.

Anyway, I looked up Taylor's Facebook account. He left the following message on KFOR's Facebook Page in response to the report:

Yep, there were lies in what "y'all" posted. Who knows, maybe he really is an undercover cop and KFOR blew his cover.

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