In the past, the only time Oklahomans ever really got a taste of being naked and afraid was being dropped off by their dad for a shift at the Red Dog. But, thankfully, the highly-rated Discovery Channel program that takes a man and a woman and places them buck-ass naked in the middle of nowhere fulfills that need for being nude and scared that apparently many Oklahomans have because it’s also the state’s most viewed reality show.
Well, at least it is according to an infographic from CableTV.com:
I guess Oklahoma should be commended for at least picking a somewhat educational program that’s on the Discovery Channel while half of the country seems to enjoy pap smear like Keeping Up With the Kardashians and America’s Next Top Model. Of course, with the upcoming educational budget cuts, this may be all we get as far as book-learnin’ goes over the next few years, so at least we're investing early. I plan on majoring in Shark Week this fall.
It should be no surprise that our neighbors to the South, Texas, enjoy the big time wheelin’ and dealin’ of Mark Cuban and the gang on Shark Tank, while in Kansas, they get off on the precarious peccadilloes of the mentally ill via Hoarders, which makes sense because Kansas is like one big mummified cat buried under a stack of National Geographic mags from the 70s.
So, really, what is it about Naked and Afraid that Oklahomans love so much? Is it our faux-survivalist mentality hashtag Infowars? Is it our Baptist-bred fear of all forms of non-matrimonial nudity? Is it the insatiable want to return to our red dirt rustic roots instead of pining away behind the desk of a Plaza District design firm that specializes in beautifying Twitter accounts?
Either way, I look forward to other reality shows copying this trend in order to those tasty Oklahoma viewers. Maybe Naked and Hoarding, where we meet hoarders who have so much trash in their house they can’t find their clothes and, if they do, there’s a rat king living in them.
Louis Fowler was naked and afraid when he wrote this. Follow him on Twitter at @LouisFowler.