That's the lesson some idiot thieves who had a few too many Lunchboxes learned this week after they stole $15 in one-dollar bills off the walls of Oklahoma City's favorite dive and then tried to use them at the IHOP across the street.
Apparently the hoodlums were not aware that A) Edna's has more cameras than the Big Brother house and B) the local TV news media would treat the theft like OJ Simpson was driving around Classen Curve in a white Ford Bronco.
Via KFOR Channel 4, KOCO Channel 5, KWTV News 9, and KOKH Fox 25:
Question. I thought it was okay to take a one-dollar bill off the wall if you used it to play songs in jukebox. Is that wrong? Please advise.
Anyway, you know I love Edna's. I have a ton of great memories about the place. It's the home of my first paid writing gig, first bar fight and first vomit in the parking the lot. In fact, I've had so many Lunchboxes that I've considered contacting the doctor from Concussion. (Although I'm now in my goddamn late 30s and don't get there as often as I should because being around a bunch of hot 21-year-old college girls makes me feel old as hell), It always has and always will be one of my favorite local bars.
That being said, isn't the media coverage a little bit over the top? They stole $15 in one-dollar bills that people stapled to a wall. Yeah, I know that's about as lame as stealing coins from the old fountain at Crossroads Mall, but it's not like we just came up with the plotline for Oceans 14. But then again, I'm writing about it so maybe it is a big deal. In fact, these hoodlums should got to prison for years. Once again, don't mess with Edna's.