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Ogle Madness IX: Sweet Sixteen, South Region

12:19 PM EDT on March 23, 2016

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Every vote counts. It doesn't matter if we're talking about city council races or presidential elections. This point is perfectly illustrated through the Second Round of OMIX. In this South Region, two separate contests were decided by a combined total of twelve votes. Weather Dongs beat out Onion Burgers 290-282, and Baker Mayfield edged past Sir John Michael 294-290. As a result, we get this:

(1) Gary England vs. (4) Weather Dongs

(2) Joleen Chaney vs. (3) Baker Mayfield

Jump back, Loretta. This is about to get spicy!

There's been some questioning in the comments and on the social intermediawebs about how the selection works. Are you voting for what you like the best? The person you love to hate? The thing with the best ass?

There are no right or wrong answers.

There is only Madness.

Listen to your heart, and vote accordingly.

(1) Gary England vs. (4) Weather Dongs

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(1) Gary England

Round One: Defeated Obesity

Round Two: Defeated Damon Lane

Who He Is: Exalted Weather Deity/reigning Ogle Madness champion

Biggest Strength: Controlling the wind and the thunder, keeping you advised

Biggest Weakness: X-ray vision has diminished in recent years

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(4) Weather Dongs

Round One: Defeated John Moreland

Round Two: Defeated Onion Burgers

What They Are: Incidental phallic imagery during weather broadcasts

Biggest Strength: Can humiliate even the proudest weatherperson

Biggest Weakness: Fleeting

(2) Joleen Chaney vs. (3) Baker Mayfield

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(2) Joleen Chaney

Round One: Defeated Lawton

Round Two: Defeated Shelby Hays

Who She Is: News 9 reporter/Watermelon Queen

Biggest Strength: Can fit inside a watermelon

Biggest Weakness: Attracts wild Gallaghers

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(3) Baker Mayfield

Round One: Defeated New Wayne Coyne

Round Two: Defeated Sir John Michael

Who He Is: OU quarterback

Biggest Strength: Excellent headband game

Biggest Weakness: From Texas

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