Welcome to the first round of Ogle Madness IX! It's kind of like March Madness, only with 72% more local meteorologists. The days ahead will be full of exciting match-ups and bracket-busting upsets. Maybe this will be the year you finally win your office pool!
You DO have a pool going, right? It's not too late to print off a dozen copies of the bracket and try to bully your co-workers into throwing down some money on this meaningless tournament. If it's like the other Madness bracket tourney your office has going, the winner will probably be someone who has never been to this site before and is just picking the names that sound best, but it's worth a shot.
Here's your morning match-ups. You have 24 hours to vote. The second half of the bracket will be up later this afternoon.
(1) Emily Sutton vs. (16) SAE Frat Boys
(8) Meg Alexander vs. (9) David Payne
(4) Mayor Mick vs. (13) Abortion Abolitionists
(5) NW 23rd and Penn Intersection vs. (12) Regular Jim Traber
Vote!
(1) Emily Sutton vs. (16) SAE Frat Boys
(1) Emily Sutton
Who She Is: Oklahoma's Weather Princess
Biggest Strength: Calling out internet meteorologists
Biggest Weakness: Pranked too easily
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(16) SAE Racist Frat Boys
Who They Are: Privileged white boys
Biggest Strength: Singing racist chants
Biggest Weakness: Bigotry, popped collars
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(8) Meg Alexander vs. (9) David Payne
(8) Meg Alexander
Who She Is: Host of "Living Oklahoma" on KOKH
Biggest Strength: Probably has a bitchin' Pinterest page
Biggest Weakness: Enunciation
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(9) David Payne
Who He Is: News 9's Weather Hefe
Biggest Strength: Futuristic storm chasing power board
Biggest Weakness: Prone to spontaneous weather boners
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(4) Mayor Mick vs. (13) Abortion Abolitionists
(4) Mayor Mick
Who He Is: Taco Bell spokesperson/city leader
Biggest Strength: Winning smile, not a far-right lunatic
Biggest Weakness: Lost an election to Mary Fallin
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(13) Abortion Abolitionists
Who They Are: Angry religious nuts
Biggest Strength: Sign-making, shouting
Biggest Weakness: Really bad party guests
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(5) NW 23rd and Penn Intersection vs. (12) Regular Jim Traber
(5) NW 23rd and Penn Intersection
What It Is: An awful place for your car to break down
Biggest Strength: Possesses a large army of crazed junkies willing to do anything; 24-hour McDonald's
Biggest Weakness: Always smells like grease and cheap menthol cigarettes
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(12) Regular Jim Traber
Who He Is: Loudmouthed sports radio personality
Biggest Strength: Spews takes that are hotter than magma, can eat an entire Mazzio's large pizza in under twelve minutes
Biggest Weakness: Unenthusiastic reading of advertising spots
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