My favorite thing about the holidays is all the parties. I don't know what it is, but there's just something fun and magical about gathering with friends, family and co-workers, drinking cheap wine, eating salty hors d'oeuvres, and pretending that you're happy and everything's going great in life.
These parties usually have some sort of gift game. Most of the time it's Dirty Santa. It's the awful one where everyone brings a wrapped $20 - $25 gift to the party (generally a candle, frame, Christmas ornament, Panini maker, or gift card purchased at Walgreens that evening). Each person that brings a gift then draws a number. When a person's number is called, they can either pick a wrapped present, or steal someone else's opened present if it has not been stolen three other times. Or is it three touches? And does that rule count for the person who drew number one? Who knows.
Anyway, Dirty Santa sucks. This is because the gifts are usually awful, and most people just spend their time trying to steal the presents that contain alcohol. Plus, you have that annoying couple who scheme to get the best presents, and that one asshole who steals and freezes the $25 Amazon Gift Card he brought. That guy is a piece of shit.
You can avoid all that boredom and drama by simply turning Dirty Santa into a White Elephant game. It's played the same way as Dirty Santa, but instead of bringing a boring $25 gift, everyone brings something cheap, goofy, tacky, and most of all, fun. Here's a list of some Oklahoma-themed items that will definitely get a laugh or two, and possibly even get you removed from next year's invite list. Awesome, huh?
