If you're new to the Oklahoma City area, there are a few important things you should know about Norman. They include:
1. Never get blocked-in on someone's lawn on a OU game day
2. Avoid Lindsay Street at all costs
3. Don't eat the chicken on Campus Corner
4. Watch out for cops... especially on Main Street
5. Never drink the water
On that list, number five is the most important thing to watch out for, especially right now. I don't know if the bodies at Lake Thunderbird have floated closer to the water treatment camp, or if the pod of freshwater blue whales that call the lake home have had diarrhea, but the water spewing out of faucets at this moment is atrocious. It tastes so bad that even the Chickasaws want nothing to do with it.
And don't just take my word for it. I hopped on Twitter and typed in "Norman Water." The consensus?
Here are some random tweets:
See what I mean? The water in Norman is awful. Knowing this, you may see some slight irony in that the Oklahoma Water Resources Board held a water conference in Norman last week:
In the real world, decisions about whether to expand a reservoir or install water pipelines aren’t decided by a roll of the dice.
But during a drought simulation Wednesday, major infrastructure projects were planned based on dice throws and bankrolled with Monopoly money. Despite the informal nature of the simulation, state water officials say they hope the simulation gave participants an idea of the complex nature of water use across the state.
Yeah, is Norman really the best place to have a conference to discuss water? That would be like the Oklahoma Department of Health discussing Ebola prevention in a Love's bathroom.
Seriously, it's hard to explain how bad the water in Norman tastes. It's in a category all by itself. If you want to play a prank on a drought-suffering farmer in Southwestern Oklahoma, give him a call and say you're going to builda pipeline connecting his farm to Norman's water supply. Before you hang up, he'll blame Obama and cuss you out like you blocked in his truck at an OU game. It really is that awful.
